𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐂𝐥𝐮𝐛 ✦ 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐟𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝

𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘶𝘭𝘵

[ Y/n ]

Since Oliver died last Spring, Boris has been getting worse with everything. Don't get me wrong, I haven't been the happiest fucking person in the world but I'm definitely not as bad as Boris.

Viktor spent most of his nights at Theo's because Boris and I are constantly fighting. I knew tonight was another night like most.

I finished my dinner and cleaned my dishes off before putting them in the dishwasher. I walked upstairs and took a deep breath.

I opened the door and saw Boris hunched over the table. I walked over and out a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, not tonight." He shook his head and grabbed a key.

"I said no." Boris ignored me and started to crush the pill. "Boris!" I raised my voice. "WHAT?!" He cried, scaring me. "I SAID NO!" I matched his tone.

"I NEED THIS!" I shook my head, "GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON WHY YOU NEED IT." "BECAUSE I NEED IT SO I DON'T REMEMBER! SO I DON'T FEEL THIS ANYMORE!"

"BORIS I MISS HIM TOO." "YOU DID NOT FUCKING KILL HIM!" I gulped and shook my head. "You- You didn't kill him either Boris."

Boris's lip began to quiver as he shook his head. "I didn't get him in time... It could've been me. I should've been me." I shook my head again and pulled him in for a hug.

Boris started to cry into my shirt, holding the soft fabric between his fingers. "Every second... I see it over and over." I rubbed his hair and felt myself tear up.

I was in our room, cleaning up. I could hear Boris and the twins playing outside. I stepped over to the window to watch them.

Boris has their ball, they went insane over that thing. I never thought a child could enjoy a ball with a little bell on it as much as these two did.

I smiled as Boris teased them by holding it above his head. Viktor was holding onto Boris's thigh, probably begging for the ball.

Boris threw it a little, probably only expecting it to land a few inches away from his foot. Instead, it bounced and rolled into the street.

Oliver ran after it, not looking. I looked and saw a car. It was coming down the street fast and wasn't far enough away for Oliver to get back to our yard fast enough. Oliver turned around and looked at Boris for a second, he gave him this smile... Like he knew. He knew he would die.

I started to bang on the window, unable to move away. Boris ran towards Oliver but made it to the curb as the car hit Oliver.

It didn't stop or even slow down. My heart on the other hand, stopped and I was finally able to move. I sprinted out of our room and down the stairs. I ran into the front yard and grabbed Viktor, pushing him inside.

I ran back out to Boris who had Oliver in his lap with his phone in his hand. He looked up at me and handed me the phone. "Sir, do you speak English?"

"This is his wife. We need an ambulance."

I held Boris, closing my eyes and listening to his sobs. "I want him back..." he whispered. I nodded and Boris started to shake. I sat us both down and continued to hold him.

Boris pulled away and shook his head. "I can't. I can't not do something. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I have to. I have to for Oliver."

I nodded a 'no' and grabbed him, wrapping my legs around his waist. Boris had started hurting himself in any way that Oliver was hurt. He got the full autopsy report so he would be accurate.

He's cut himself, burned himself, broken his bones, scratched himself, and so much more. "Please let go." He whimpered. "Boris I won't let you fucking kill yourself." He cried and pulled at my hands. "I need to!"

"This isn't what Oli would want Boris! If he knew you were hurting yourself he would cry for days!" "HE CAN NOT CRY BECAUSE HE IS DEAD!" I cried into his shirt, trying to block his voice out.

"My... Fault..." he whispered, letting his head hang low. I sniffed and continued togrow cry.  "It'll get better one day my love... Be strong... For Oliver."