First Impression 2

Chapter 3

-Niall's POV-

With my iniured hand shoved into my jeans pocket, I continued to stride my way back to the hotel room. I tried my hardest to avoid all the people I could.

The door was still slightly ajar. Thank God because being the dumbass that I am I forgot to grab a room key.

"Hayley look I'm s..." I stopped midsentence when my eyes fell on the bed. The covers remained the same from earlier.  We had just been lying there together this morning, naked, and now here I am staring. Not able to believe it.

"Hayley?" I called out again but the only response I got was my own voice bouncing off the walls of this abandoned hotel room. I felt my pulse quicken. Where was she? Surely she didn't just leave?  Did she? I clawed at the door leading into the bathroom. Nothing. The shower? Nope. Her bag wasn't even here... She did leave.

I sunk back onto the plush bed that now only seemed cold and useless. My face fell into my hands before my fingers began to violently tug at my hair.

"She didn't leave!" I called aloud. "She couldn't!  She wouldn't!"

But she did.

I picked up my phone, nearly crushing it in my fist. Without thinking, my fingers flew across the screen, dialing Hayley's number.

The ringtone rang in my ear, reminding me that she wasn't here with me. She was elsewhere.  Anywhere.

"Hayley, please. Pick up."

-Hayley's POV-

"You need to tell him where you are." McKenna advised as I dumped another bag of ice into the chest.

"Hand me that pack of beer." I commanded, ignoring her comment.

She rolled her eyes but obliged.

Niall was not on my mind right now. Okay that's a lie, of course he was on my mind. He always is. But he wasn't in my concern at the moment. He probably didn't even know I was gone. He probably paid someone for alcohol or something. It better only be alcohol. H was probably drinking away his worries, drowning me away from his mind just like I was about to do.

"He probably doesn't even know I'm gone." I sighed after I buried the cold cans into the ice.

I could hear her socked covered feet pad over to me. She was hesitating, I knew it. McKenna was never really good with advice. It just wasn't her strong suit.

"Niall may be an ass sometimes but that doesn't mean he doesn't care about you."

I laughed. "Yeah, he cares so fucking much. Leaving me in that damned hotel room alone. Not believing me when Chris made up stories. Thinking I was against him. Asking me to give up my life ao it was more convenient for him." My voice rose with each sentence before I slammed the door of the ice chest down. Niall's temper was beginning to rub off on me.

Silence hung in the air. The only thing being heard was my raged uneven breathing.

"Does... does he know you feel this way?" McKenna asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

I shook my head. "No. Every time I try to confront him about it or when we're arguing the only thing running through my kind is that I could lose him. And that voice in my head screams Stop fighting it! You're going to lose him. He can replace you so easily and you'll be broken and alone. Give in. Give in now! And I hate it. I hate feeling this way about myself. I hate hating myself. I hate feeling like I have to cling to him. I used to be able to hold my own but ever since Niall came into my life.. I just. I dunno I feel so hopeless and helpleas when he's gone. I feel as if I am constantly guilty. I can't look at other guys without feeling so awful. I love him. I really really love him, McKenna,  but I'm scared that I'm clinging too tight and eventually he's just going to leave me. He'll find someone better. Someone prettier,  sexier, more famous. Someone who can give him everything I can't." I sighed loudly trying to control my emotions from overpowering me. I have held that in for so long and now my heart was open, wide open, on my dorm room floor with no one to help me.

McKenna crouched infront of me, hugging me awkwardly.  It was just that, awkward,  but comforting.She was actually trying instead of just brushing it off as usual.

"Let's get some alcohol in you. Tomorrow is going to be rough as hell for you."

"Because Niall has to head back..?" I asked with a light laugh.

McKenna tried to smile but I could see the pain in her eyes. "Well that too."

And then it hit me. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day.

((Hey sorry for a short update but my phone js dying and I'm at the airport and I hadn't written all weekend. I really loved Boston. it is so pretty! however I'm glad to get back to my small hometown. My updates will be returning to its sorta abnormal hut regular updates..  that made no sense but oh Well:) I hope you enjoy.))