Hetalia One Shots

Everything Means Nothing Without You - Sweden x Finland

Sweden - Berwald
Finland - Timo

Berwald stared at the mirror and waited for two arms to wrap around his middle. This was the second time he had dressed in a full on suit. The second time. God.... Berwald didn't know how to act. He had to stay tough for the kids. For everyone else. For... For.... For Timo.

It hurt just to think of that name let alone allowing it to slip through his lips and echo in the room around him. It hurt just as much as the explosive fights between him and Magnus. It just didn't feel right. The lacking of another being beside him.

A widow. A widower. He could think of many names that society would place upon him now that Timo was gone. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he stood up tall and keep himself from breaking down.

He walked down the hall and down the stairs with a numbness in his heart. There wasn't many feelings he had at this moment. Ones that he'd gladly show were under lock and key and weren't for now. He made a promise and he was going to see it through until his darkest day.

The car had arrived and now he was overthinking everything. The subtle panicking that fed under his skin and tugged at his heart; squeezing against his lungs.

"Are you ready?" asked his Mother holding onto the boys' hands. He looked down at Peter and Erland. Both of them had tear stained faces and bloodshot eyes. Timo... Timo played a big role in their lives. Of course being the other parental figure and helping Berwald raise them was one of the key factors.

Berwald nodded and led them out towards the car. As the trees went passed, his throat got tighter and he found it harder to breathe. Each step felt more and more like someone else's and not him. It didn't feel real.

The building was bustling with people all of them sharing pleasantries but never giving condolences. Not just yet. "I need a minute." Berwald murmured thickly. The words just didn't want to get out. He wanted to scream about it. He wanted to scream until there was no words left.

He breathed in and out a few times and let himself compose enough for him to go in there. The first few steps echoed through the stone building and announced his presence for him. He nodded to a few people and stood at the front of the room.

It all felt so different. There was no blushing smiles or shy glances of a couple waiting to be wed. There was no Timo next to him smiling brighter than the sun. Neither was there clapping after he had kissed his newly wedded husband.

Berwald tried not to break down in front of all these people as the ceremony started. Timo was a valued member of the Finnish Army. He served a long time and was awarded many medals because of it.

There was a long amount of hymns and talking from other people and then it happened. He was suddenly the one helping 5 others including Magnus, Sigurd and Eirikur carry the coffin on his shoulder.

The tears threatened to leak from his eyes and his heart threatened to cease its beating. It only hit him fully after he lowered Timo into the dirt beneath him. The feeling felt like the weight of the world was suddenly on his shoulders. Nothing could matter now that Timo was gone.

Everyone had left after paying their respects. Gradually, he was left by himself after several condolences. There was nothing in the world that could've prepared him for burying his husband 6 feet underground. Neither was there any plan for him to pick up where he had left off a couple of weeks ago. Nothing. Just a void within his being and a person shaped void in his life.

There wasn't much he could do now. When he got home, he was soaked to the bone and his body was starting to ache. It felt as though his blood was freezing and he couldn't live anymore. Berwald couldn't put into words the emotions that overwhelmed him. He couldn't fathom how to live without someone who had been with him every step of the way.

"The moon and the stars mean nothing without you." he murmured to the photo of him and Timo. It was true in a sense. He felt like nothing mattered now that he was gone. He opened the draw to put the photo away and he came upon a letter.

One that bore his name in that all too familiar cursive writing. In it was the words of comfort that he couldn't have received from anyone else. The words that Timo normally spoke for him. He smiled through the tears and through the heartache.

Timo was prepared and he made sure that Berwald knew what to do for the next year. Especially with letters being given to him by his friends when the time came. Berwald wanted to laugh. It was so unlike Timo to prepare for the next year, he normally loved to live in the moment. His misty eyes lingered on a sentence that cut into his heart like a knife and filled his veins with a fire he was unsure of where it came from.

I love you Berwald, to the moon; to the stars and beyond. Your beloved - Timo