her truth

trying and failing

After her one session, sandra kept what she heard to her mind, to be thinking deeply about it. To his mother's house, Diego was gone to work on a car to leave Sandra and Emily there for Sandra to be playing with her has the rest of his family had what they needed to do.
Has Sandra was to the floor to be playing with Emily with her toys Sandra kept thinking.
Turning her head, Diego then came in with a happy mood for Sandra to fully eye over him to sign has she saw his red eyes, Sandra knew he had to have been smoking with his friends, she didn't even know if he was actually fixing a car or not. This was something he was doing a lot more during the weekends which made Sandra not happy but she didn't think Diego cared about her happiness.
Diego then took off his shoes to go about them to ignore has he always did to go straight into his mother's kitchen to gather some food to stay in there to talk in Spanish for him to then go to his phone.
Sandra looked over him to then look to Emily who was cooing and playing to shake her head.
Why do you care so much about yourself and not our daughter?
Sandra then took in a deep breathe to continue to play with Emily, has the day progressed, they eventually went home for Sandra to place Emily to her crib to then turn to go downstairs to eye over Diego has he was to his phone to be eyeing over it, sandra then went to him to eye over.
"I want to talk."
"About?"
"The way that I'm feeling and...."
"I don't want to talk about that."
Sandra signed.
"Why not?"
"You get crazy notions in your head and since you are talking to that therapist I just don't really want to talk to you. Think you having this person is making you more crazier."
Sandra parted her lips to eye over Diego to sign to then get up to go to the kitchen.
"Make me something to eat."
Sandra stopped to the kitchen to make a hard face to then go and do just that, coming back with food she sat to the ground has she didn't really want to be next to him.
"You know, you go to my mother's all the time and you still can't cook like her."
"Well, I'm not a Mexican woman Diego."
"Can see that with what I'm eating."
"If you don't like it how about you make something for yourself."
"You are so selfish Sandra, I work all week and on the weekend to pay for you and Emily and this is the thanks I get." Diego scoffed.
Sandra eyed over her food to lose her appetite to then get up to throw it away to then place the dish to the sink to sign has she heard Emily start to cry.
"Diego.... Can you please go to Emily?"
"That's your job." He laughed.
Sandra got mad to then turn to go straight upstairs.
"Your so sensitive, it was a joke!" He called after.
Sandra rolled her eyes to then go to Emily's room to grab ahold of her to then take her to the bed to lay her down to then take out her breast to fed her to have a hand to her head to eye over has Emily looked to her to fed.
Sandra then turned her head to look down to eye over Diego.
"Why is she in our bed?"
"Im tired, this is easier. Besides you bring her in here every time she cries instead of helping her go to sleep in her crib again so...."
"That's because it's your job Sandra! I go to work at a job i hate to pay for everything while you stay here to be on your ass to take care of my daughter! You are so selfish! And now we can't even have sex because she's in the bed!"
Sandra darted her eyes over Diego to gulp has he turned to go to the bathroom to slam the door, tears started to go down Sandra's face to then turn her head to look down has Emily eyed up to be confused.
Sandra took in a deep breathe to take her breast out of Emily's mouth to make a decision, she grabbed up Emily to grab a blanket for herself and her daughter to go downstairs to sleep on the futon, she didn't want Emily to have to endure this.
Has they settled, Sandra kept looking to Emily has Diego had came down stairs to eye.
"What are you doing Sandra?"
"Go to bed Diego."
"What are you doing?" He said more slowly.
"Diego you need to go to bed, I know how tired you are. You have work tomorrow, just go to bed."
"You need to get up and go in there too."
"Not tonight Diego. Go to bed."
"Sandra! Get your ass into bed!"
Sandra laid down next to Emily who had fallen asleep to eye over her daughter.
"Ugh..... You are so.... Whatever!"
Diego turned to then go upstairs to slam the door for Sandra to move closer to Emily, to then close her eyes has fresh tears started to fall.
Why do you have to be this way to me? What have I've ever done to you? Why do you have to be so mean to me?
Sandras chin quivered has she had more tears start to fall down her face to then open her eyes to make sure they were not getting on Emily since they were very much close, seeing nothing was to her, Sandra closed her eyes to think of only the happy times with her daughter that she was very near to start to take in deep breathes to calm herself.
I.... Don't care what your father does to me Emily.....has long has you don't see it and he never does these things to you.....I can only hope.....