I'll Fight Hell to Hold You

Tough Conversation

Paul knew Tommy would listen to him after awhile. When the girls were asleep Paul sat down on the side of the bed and kissed Tommy's cheek. "Baby, if you're awake, please just listen to me." "I'm not going to force you to make a decision that you'll regret later." "All I'm asking you to do is think about all the options and make an intelligent decision. If you choose none then I'm okay with it too."

Tommy turned to face Paul. "Do you really and truly want Madyson? Do you really love me? I know you love our daughters but do you love me?"

Yes. I do to all those questions."

"I don't believe you." "I think you're just staying so you don't have to pay child support or alimony."

Paul looked at Tommy in disbelief. "What?" "If I didn't still love you I would have left already. As far as support, well, whatever happens it will always be there. If you and I split, I'll pay for you and the girls to live comfortably. Alimony-just name your price."

"That's the thing. I wouldn't ask you for anything except loving the girls." "I'm not worthy of any of that nor am I worthy of anything nice in life. I love you and always will even though I don't deserve a damned bit of love."

After that statement Tommy clammed up and quit talking. Tears rolled down his face as he withdrew into himself.

Paul sat there in shocked silence, not having a clue what to do next. He sucked up his pride and called Eric. Breaking down into tears, he told a rambling story telling them what had happened.

Eric was silent for a few minutes before softly telling Paul he'd be there to talk to Tommy. "Paul, take the girls home or better yet, come over here. Gene was never mad at you. You need as much comfort as Tommy right now. I'll stay with Tom. Just let me get some things together."

Paul choked out his thanks and went to leave Tommy's things in the dresser. He wiped away a constant flow of tears. Somehow he managed to get everything together. As soon as Eric walked in, he broke down on his shoulder. "Hey, sh. Go talk to Geneie and I'll take care of Tom. "

Paul was surprised when Gene took the girls and carried them to the car. He took Paul and wrapped his arm around him. "I love you as a brother and a best friend. You and I are going to talk until you feel like you can cope. I can't lose you or Tommy just as you can't."

Tommy had watched the whole thing wordlessly. He held out his arms to Eric as the shorter man wrapped him in a tight hug. "Don't lose yourself Tom. We all love you and need you. No matter what,  we're all here."

Eric could feel Tommy shaking from raw emotion as he held him without words being passed.