I'll Fight Hell to Hold You

Aftermath

Paul stayed with Tommy after the sedative took effect. He had a long talk with the doctor about Tommy's mental health. "I know he needs to get help but I don't want him on medication until the baby is born."

"I understand that Mr. Stanley but the longer he goes without medication, the worse he can get."

Paul now had to make the decision that could affect a lot of lives. He dared not do anything until he talked to Tommy. Sitting at his husband's bedside, he rubbed Tommy's stomach, feeling their growing baby. "Little Mady this is your daddy. I won't do anything to hurt you but I also want your momma to heal." Paul went on to talk to Mady while Tommy slept.

A few hours later, Tommy woke up and found Paul asleep in the recliner. He had the t.v .remote in his hand and was snoring softly. "Paul, wake up." called Tommy.

Paul woke a few minutes later and saw Tommy staring at him. "Baby, everything okay now?"

"Not really but I need to move on. Could we talk about taking Mady early?" "I don't want to but I'm scared."

"Why?"

"Paul, if I continue to go without medication, I'm afraid I'll cut so deep I'll bleed out and I don't want to but it takes away the pain and so I do it even though  I know it's wrong and I know it hurts you but I can't quit and Oh Paul I'm so scared." Tommy rambled until he ran out of steam.

"Sh, baby. It's going to be okay. I promise."

Paul pulled Tommy into a tight hug and held him close. "I'm not going to let you hurt yourself on purpose. I want you to try and come to me if you want or need to talk." "As far as Mady coming early, let's discuss other options." 

Tommy agreed reluctantly and scooted over to let Paul lie beside him. They held hands and really talked.