My Janitor [Jessie J] *COMPLETED* (UNDER EDITING)

Her Own | 26. Jessie's 2nd P.O.V

A/N: If you all remember, Jessie has had one chapter in her point of view. It happened in the first book, where it was absolutely necessary. Like it is now! So, enjoy the insight of Jessie's mind.

Syd being gone for a long amount of time was driving me crazy. And not in the good way either. I missed her more than I've ever missed anybody before. If it wasn't for Katy holding me hostage, I would've flown to every island in Hawaii until I've found her.

"Want some wine, Jessie?" Katy asked from the kitchen.

"No!" I said loudly. I wasn't supposed to drink alcohol, as I've learned after that dinner Syd has prepared me.

"Oh, yeah. That's right. You're too pregnant to drink."

"There's no such thing as 'too pregnant', Katy."

Katy emerged from the kitchen, sipping on a glass of wine. When she saw I gave her a look, she protested, "Hey, I need this! Looking after a pregnant you is a struggle! Besides, when are you going to the doctor?"

"As soon as Syd comes back," I said, matter-of-factly.

"No, Jessie. Make an appointment soon."

"But I want Syd to hear their heartbeat," I sadly said, pouting at my friend.

"Skype her then! It's not rocket science, you know?"

"But, it isn't the same--"

Katy groaned then got off the couch and walked away. The whole time Syd's been away, I've been an extremely difficult person. Dealing with mood swings and fatigue and morning sickness has changed me a little. Hazel was away at a gymnastics camp, so she couldn't distract me with her love.

And not only that, but my urges have been off the wall. I swear, if Sydney was here now, I'm sure she would be hiding out of fear of us having long, rough sex. Obviously, I haven't told her about it. She might get the wrong idea and think in going to sleep with the 100 million guys she said before she left.

Katy even suggested I sleep with her, so I wouldn't be with a complete stranger. But, it would change our friendship, and she had a boyfriend. I think. She barely talks to him or about him anymore.

"I miss her," I said out loud. "I miss her so much."

"You've said that over a hundred times, Jessie," Katy groaned from the kitchen.

"But it's true! I want her back in my arms! Not with some Hawaiian slut!"

"Jessica! Language!"

Katy came back out of the kitchen with two bowls of ice cream. She handed me one, and I began eating right away.

"She said I wasn't going to be fat," I said, looking down at myself. "I'm gaining weight!"

"Jessie, chill out. You don't even look like you have."

Instead of putting the bowl down, I continued eating the ice cream. It's a comfort food, especially when I don't have my wife here beside me. She's too busy off with some islander chick.

"Katy, I need someone," I said suddenly.

"Why? Because you're jealous of Luna?" Katy teased.

"Of course! I need to get my mind off of Sydney with some other chick that isn't me!"

Katy patted my curly hair. "If you're sure, okay then. But don't come crying to me when you fūck someone then realize you made a mistake and that Sydney won't ever forgive you."

I rolled my eyes. "It'll be meaningless. Right?"

"Only if you make it."

"...Do you think Syd would still want me back?"

"When she comes back, would you want her back?" Katy asked.

"Oh, of course I would," I automatically responded. "I love her too much to lose her!"

"Then there's your answer..."

~

A/N #2: From this point on, it'll get a little graphic...well, very graphic. And I'm sure you all will hate me! :D

Days have past by, and it's getting harder and harder to control myself. Late at night, I would touch myself to images of Sydney, imagining that she was touching me instead. Missing her was getting to a point where I was going insane. I yearned for her touch, not only as in hugs or hand-holding either. As in her fingers inside me, pumping me to a well-needed release.

Katy said I had one last chance with her offer. I declined it politely just before answering the door to Mike. He's seen me around alone, and he's started to flirt with me again. This time, with more touching involved.

I know I shouldn't have done this, I should have stopped. I should've walked away from him, in respect for Syd. But, my needs were skyrocketing, and I needed to be touched. He was the only guy that flirted with me, since I guess all the others saw Syd and I together.

One night, I couldn't handle it anymore, and I made out with him heatedly. He gladly kissed back, deepening it, and he pushed me to Syd and I's room. Katy was out, so she couldn't be there to tell me this was wrong.

We were soon naked, and I felt his hands on my body. One drifted down to my soaking center, and I spread my legs wide for him. Two fingers pushed their way inside me, and I moaned loudly before meeting his hand with my thrusts. He put a third one in there, and I sped up my hips. He intently stared at me as I enjoyed his fingers inside of me,

"You haven't been with a guy in a while. I can tell," he murmured, extracting his hand, and I whimpered.

Within my hazy state, I felt him position himself at my entrance. Then he pushed into me slowly. Too slow. My hands went to his back, and I pushed my hips up to meet his. We both moaned in sync before we began moving our hips.

The feeling was so good, I couldn't do nothing but moan. Him meeting my hips with fast and hard movements along with his thumb rubbing my clït felt out of this world. Nothing could keep me from enjoying this.

But as I neared my release, my eyes flew open and I gasped in shock. I remembered Sydney.

"STOP! PLEASE STOP!" I yelled, pushing Mike off of me.

I quickly moved and slid under the covers and covered myself up. What did I just do?

"Jessie...Come on, baby. I know you want this--" Mike tried.

"No, please! This was a huge mistake! I'm sorry, but leave!" I can't believe I did this to Sydney. After she said how much she hated Mike, and I betray her like this...I hated myself.

The door opened, and I saw Katy standing there. Her face grew red in fury, and she screamed for Mike to get out while I sat there, silently crying. Mike scrambled to get his clothes, and ran out. Katy's face slightly softened as she came over to me.

"I hate myself," I said, running a hand through my hair. "I truly hate myself now. Not only have I had an affair, but with someone who Sydney hates. I just...I'm a disgrace! She won't love me anymore!"

Katy crossed her arms and shook her head. "Jessica, I told you."

She then sat beside me in the bed and kissed my temple, then held me as I cried about Sydney. What have I done?