365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 55

September 15th, 2009

I wasn't feeling like going to school that day. Because I knew I would probably fight with Derek. He was getting more and more on my nerves everyday. Luckily, as I got up that morning for breakfast, my Mom told me that Safaa had been sick all night long. 

- Can you stay with her today ? Doniya can't, she have exams all day.

- It's OK, I will. 

I smiled, I was so happy to miss school. Even tough it was to take care of my sick sister. I grabbed two bowls and a box of cereal, to bring them up. I knocked on Safaa's door before getting in. She was sleeping and woke up as I sat on the mattress. 

- Zayn... ? What time is it ? I need to go to school !

- I'm staying with you today. Mom said we won't go to school.

She smiled a bit, before taking one of the bowl in her hand. I fulled it up with cereals, that she ate without milk. She was always doing that and I was finding that cute. When she finished, she went back to sleep and I brought everything downstairs. My mom was leaving, as well as Waliyha. 

We spend all the morning on the couch, in the living room. Watching some cartoons. In fact, I was watching them while Safaa was almost sleeping on me. She had a bowl in her hand, just in case she was feeling sick again. But she looked better. At least a bit. I taught that before she woke up, coughing. A lot.

- You're OK ?

She shook her head, quickly. 

- OK, come here...

I stood up, with my sister in my arms, and I ran up to the bathroom. I put her back on the floor, next to the toilet. She threw up everything as I was holding her hair. And she started to cry. A lot. Saying that her tummy was hurting and that she wasn't liking the feeling. I sat on the floor and made her do the same thing, between my legs. She was holding her bowl really tight. And she was crying. Even more when she threw up again. In her bowl. And that's when I saw that it was red. Blood. I started to freak out. It was just a sip of it but it was enough. I didn't knew what to do. So I just... Lost it. 

- K' Saf, get up... We're going in the car...

I helped her and we walked out of the room, then out of the house. I didn't know what I was doing. I had drove like twice and it was with my dad. A couple of months ago. I helped her getting in the car and after went to the driver seat. 

- Zayyyn ! She shouted.

I heard that she was sick again. I wasn't feeling pretty great neither. 

- It's going to be OK Princess, I swear... Just stay calm, OK ?

I turned to see her nodded, then we were gone. I still don't know how we got to the hospital in one piece. I hold her in my arms as I was running inside. I don't remember much about what happened. Safaa was still throwing up blood and a nurse took quickly care of her. After... I just sat in the hallway.  And I called my mom after a while. 

- Zayn ? Is everything OK ?

- Mom... I started to cry at that moment. Mom, Saf was sick again and... I didn't knew what to do...

- Zayn, where are you ? What's the sound in the background ?

- At the hospital... I whispered, crying a bit more.

- I'm coming. 

And I was alone again, crying in the hallway of an hospital.

When my Mom finally found me, I hadn't move. Until I saw her. I got up and ran in her arms. She hugged me tight and I cried even more. 

- How did you get there ? 

- I drove, I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't, but I didn't knew what to do and...

- Calm down Zayn... It's OK...

I have a blank about anything that happen between that moment and the one I went to sleep. I just remember that Safaa had to stay in observation for the night. I didn't sleep well. In fact, I didn't sleep at all. I was way too worried about my sister for that. My little Princess...

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Soooooo ! I know, it's sad and everything, but I got this entry in my mind until the very start ! So that's why it's so long, I had imagine way too much things about that moment x) I hope you liked it any way, lot's of love for the new year xx