365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 99

October 29th, 2009

Halloween was in two days. We always were putting the decorations way before that date but this year... Without Safaa it wasn't the same. Since she was pretty young, she was the one asking to put them out. So, when I get back home in the afternoon to see the big brown boxes on the counter next to Doniya, I was a bit lost. Waliyha was there too, a cup of tea in her hands. I walked up to the fridge, to grab a pot of yogurt. I was about to eat it when I stopped, because both of my sisters were staring at me. 

- What ? I said, raising an eyebrow. 

No one said a thing and Niya grabbed my hand and made me followed her outside. It was probably pretty cool to watch, me wearing my college clothes and holding a yogurt and my sister almost running outside. I stopped in the middle of the front yard, looking at her.

- What's happening ?

- We're going to decorate.

She stared at the door so I did the same. Waliyha had changed her cup of tea for one of the box and she was about to fall in the stairs. 

- Someone ? I may need help.

I looked back to Doniya, she really seemed like she wanted to do that. I blew and took a deep breath. 

- I'm going to change myself.

I didn't wanted to soil my college clothes, my Mom would have beat me. She smiled and I walked back home. I went into my room, grabbing a pair of jeans and a grey sweater. I was ready. When I get downstairs, there was no box left so I just went outside. They were both fighting to unravel a spiderweb. A small smile took place in my face. I helped them and we started to decorate. No one said a thing about Safaa. But I was still sad because she couldn't do it this year. And probably not any others.

When we finished, it was dark outside. We ate together and it wasn't so bad. But there was definitely something missing. or more... Someone. My Saf. After cleaning everything up, I went back outside, sitting on the stairs. I saw what we had done, it was pretty cool. Without the sun light, it was even cooler. And I heard what would Safaa say. "Why do we have to wait until the 31 to go treats and threading ?"  laughed sadly, looking back down. She would have loved that afternoon. My eyes started to be wet and I didn't do a thing when a first tear ran off of my eyes. I still couldn't understand why it was happening to her. I still can't. I heard to front door opening and I wiped my eyes before looking at who it was. Waliyha was standing there, a bit awkwardly. 

- Doniya made a cake... You want some ?

I nodded and she smiled. A shy smile. Our relationship was getting better. 

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So ? Good or not ? I'm sorry, I couldn't post yesterday, I had no time for me ! I still don't have today, but I'm still writing two entries x) I'll try pretty hard not to miss a day, but I can't promise ! There's just so many things coming at the same time... So, so sorry ! I still love you pretty much !

*The second entry will be there soon !