365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 74

October 4th, 2009

I decided to take a slow day that Sunday. I really needed it. But it didn't really happened. I went downstairs to eat my breakfast and my resolution was already broken. I sat at the table with my toast when Waliyha came into the kitchen. She opened to fridge door, looking for something. She then looked at me and we started to argue. I don't really remember much, we were fighting way too often. I think it was about the box of milk I hadn't put into the trash, even though I hadn't took milk since the night before. By the way, it's not the point. The point is that my supposed slow day started with an argue with my little sister. Which is never a good way to start a day. 

I then get back into my room to do some homework. I was way too late in all my classes. So I opened up my books on my desk, I took a pencil and I started to do the exercises. Which was boring. I even add some music, but there was nothing to do. I couldn't concentrate on those shitty things. As someone had ear me, I received a text message at that time.

"Hey, can I come over ? - Mark"

"If you're funnier than homework, I won't say no."

"Coming"

A small smile came up to my face as I closed my books. Mark was coming over, unexpectedly. Just as before. I had a bit of my old life back. 

When he arrived, I had put some clothes on, a dark blue sweater and a pair of jeans with a bunch of holes. We went on the basement and we played video games almost all day long. Talking about everything. It was like the old times were back. 

- Why Eli hates you now ?

I swallowed, then shoot three zombies before answering. 

- I asked her out. 

He paused the game and, even though I was still staring right in front of me, I knew he was looking at me. 

- Can I ask you something else. 

- Go ahead. 

- Why did you broke up with her if you still love her ?

I blew and pressed my back against to couch, my eyes closed. How was I about to explain something I wasn't even understanding ? But I tried, because Mark was still my best friend, so he had the right to know. 

- I was so damn jealous... You can't even understand... I was afraid of her falling for Derek and letting me go... In fact... That happened. And it's probably all my fault...

I was only whispering, by the end. And it hurt again. My heart was still hurting. It was becoming insane.

- I can understand being jealous like that.

I opened my eyes and looked at him. And I saw something in his eyes I had never see before. A little sparkle of pain he was trying to contain. A little bit of how fake has been his happiness since a while.

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So, like it or not ? For myself, I pretty much like the Zayn-Mark part !