365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 87

October 17th, 2009

I spent all the day at the hospital, with my family. But my Dad wasn't there and Safaa asked why a lot of times. I knew by the look in my Mom's face that she didn't knew where he was neither. I was supposed to be back, he was always back from London on Saturday's. And we were Saturday. 

- Maybe he's doing like in every TV show. He's living us when the times get harder.

That's what Waliyha said and no one talked about Dad again. No one wanted to think that he was maybe away forever. Even tough I wasn't in good terms with him, I was wishing for him to come back soon. Safaa was deserving way better than that. 

Doniya drove home after the time for the visit had ended. Mom had stayed there, only parents were allowed to stay at the hospital for the night. I had never been in a car that quiet. No one was saying a thing, we were all looking at the road. It's Waliyha who broke the silence, her voice shaking a bit.

- Do you think he really left ?

She still didn't get an answer and my older sister turned in her street. Waliyha had her answer there. My Dad's car was parking in the driveway, almost hitting the brick wall of the house. The three of us get out quickly of the car, almost running inside. To find our Dad totally drunk on the couch, watching an old American soap. He always hated American soap. He woke up when he heard the door, looking at us like he had never saw us before. He had a strange sparkle in his eyes, I could felt that my sisters were a bit worried. Dad went closer and Waliyha grabbed my hand. She would have never did that in a normal time, but it wasn't normal at all. My heart was beating faster and faster as the seconds were passing. He was looking pretty weird. I had never saw him drunk before and I wasn't ready at all. I started to walk up to the stairs, facing my Dad and hiding my sisters in my back. 

- It's your fault... To the three of you... He said, his tone harder than ever.

- Go upstairs, I whispered to my sisters but they were frozen.

- You all got stupid problems, so Safaa needed to have some too. If you didn't had those, she wouldn't be sick...

He was really looking weird and I was starting to be afraid. But I needed to take care of my sisters before everything. "Go upstairs..." I whispered, pushing her on the stairs. They listened that time and I heard them locking themselves in the same room. I faced back my father, he had came nearer, almost at an inch of me. 

- Most of all it's your fault Zayn... If you hadn't drove that stupid car, no one would had found she was sick. She would still be a young girl with a lot of opportunities...

- She would be sick anyway.

- YOU DID THAT TO HER ! 

- I DIDN'T CREATED HER FUCKING CANCER OK ? I DON'T WANT HER TO BE SICK BUT THAT'S HOW LIFE IS ! IT'S A FUCKING SHIT !

- The only shit I see there it's you.

It hurt. But I just looked into his eyes, I wasn't afraid of him at all. In fact, maybe I was a bit but I didn't wanted him to know. He came even closer to me and punched my face pretty hard. I couldn't believe he did that. 

- I HATE YOU ! I screamed before running upstairs, knocking on the only door that was closed.

Doniya opened the door and swore when she saw my face. She went into the bathroom to find the first aid kit then she locked us again in her room. Waliyha was sitting on the corner of the bed, her arms around her knees. I let Doniya cleaning my face and then, we joined the youngest of us on the bed. For once, we weren't arguing nor insulting each others. We were only in silence, hearing the sounds our Dad was making downstairs. Freaking out that he would come into the room. But he never did and I watched them falling slowly asleep on both of my side. 

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I hate his dad, just as I hate a lot of people in that story x)