365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 180

January 18th, 2010

Once again, I was in my way to my psychologist office. I wasn't supposed to go that day, I remember that. I was only eating in the cafeteria, my nurse sitting in front of me, when she seemed like she heard something. I later learned that she had a blue-tooth or whatever this thing was called. Anyway, that's not the point. 

She listened to the person speaking to her and she nodded a couple of times, saying some "hm-hm". Then she looked up at me and stood on her feet. 

- Let's go Zayn. You need to go see Dr. Jefferson. 

I knew that I would gain nothing with arguing, so I stood up and followed her up to the office. I knocked on the door and waited for an answered. Dr. Jefferson appared after a short moment, smiling a lot. He pushed his glasses back in place and got away from the place. 

- There's someone here for you Zayn.

And, as I stepped inside of the room, I had my breath took away. I almost thought that I would felt on my knees, right in that moment. But, before I could do it, she was running to me, jumping in my arms. I wrapped them around her waist and held her so close to me... I was feeling less empty, all in once. She was there, she didn't let me go... That as all I could think in that moment. I realized that I was crying when she got back and wiped the tears with her thumb. I think I heard Dr. Jefferson telling us that he'd be back an hour later, but I wasn't paying attention. 

- Stop crying Zayn... Or I'll cry too... She said, with a quiet laugh.

- Alexis Dubois, crying ? Yeah, of course !

But her eyes were glossing, I knew she would have cried if I didn't had stopped. I leaded her to the couch and she sat on my lap. I didn't protested, because I wanted her near me. I needed her to be near me. She was the only one understanding what I was leaving, what I was going through. She really looked like she cared and knew. 

- How... What are you doing here ? I asked her after a while of just sitting there and staring in each others eyes. 

- Let's say that I know Dr. Jefferson very well. 

I made her a head sign, meaning I wanted her to elaborate. And she did it, after putting her head on my shoulder and blowing. 

- I came here, last year. I was just coming out when I met you. 

I was really surprised in the moment. I never would have thought of that. But it made sense. How she was able to understand me so much. How she was taking care of me like that. She knew what it was feeling like. I held her even more tighter after that and she laughed. It was great to hear her laughing. It made me realized that, maybe, there was some light in the world. 

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What are you guys thinking about ? ALEXIS' BAAAAACK !