Sapphire's Review Store 3.0

Review by Jacob: Are You Crazy?

Title: Are You Crazy? 

Author: JokeWasOnMe

Reviewer: Prince_Pretence

Cover: 1/5

Please change it. First, it does not have any context to the book whatsoever. Second, lack of title or subtitle or even your name. Third, if the artwork isn't done by you, then it's a good chance that it is done by some artist who is not aware of you using their artwork without their permission and it's not a good thing to do, apart from the fact that you can be sued over it.

Blurb: 4.5/5

That first line is by far the craziest and insightful thing I've read so far in a blurb. No lies. It was comical, dark and had a start to it. Then comes the second paragraph. Whereas there is nothing inherently wrong with it, but given to what I've read so far, I think that the blurb is a little too revealing. Now, that wouldn't have been a problem either had the story developed a subplot, but the story literally moves on the terms shown in the blurb—which means that someone who knows a good deal about zombie/apocalypse/adventure novels, can quickly figure out the plot after the first or second chapter. If the book develops a plot more than what I have read until the 'Recon' chapter [the last one that you posted], now that would be a real plot twist and possibly the only reason to reveal that the two strangers will change our protagonist's life, because it's evident that they will, or they wouldn't exist. Otherwise, I'd suggest limiting it to that one impressive line or rewriting it in such a manner that it's not too revealing.

Grammar: 2/5

You must edit the book. When I first saw your request for review—the spelling mistakes were baffling. And believe me, the eternal judge side of mine would've bet itself that a writer who is so careless with simple spellings can't write any good. Sorry, but that's how it is also for hundreds and thousands of your potential readers. No matter how good your story is, it needs critical attention in grammar, tenses and punctuation fields. And the thing is, that there is also no need for an extensive rewrite or something—just a critical reread and severe editing. You can yourself do it, or get one of the community members to do it for you. There are most silly spelling mistakes and minutes, but distracting tense changes. I did not comment on every single mistake because honestly, that's nitpicking, and I was too busy wanting to know more about our chaotic but charming trio. But there was one place where I have commented, so hopefully that works as a marker about the whole tenses fiasco. About spellings—you will know if you run the text through the most common, freeware for grammar check. And so goes with the punctuations. All in all, nothing too grave, but definitely damaging.

Character Building: 5/5

This is part where you wanted me to focus, and that alone makes it so hard: what am I supposed to critique? But I'll try.

Apocalypse/adventure novels have forever been my favourite genre to read and the worst genre to write. I've seen many characters, and most of them are "badass". Sage is literally one of the two characters that actually deserve to be called badass. And the thing that I love about her the most—her lack of witty sarcasm. The lady can speak, act, kill—do everything that makes her a badass and at the same time, acts like a natural person. Like, I can't emphasise enough on how much I love her for being relatable and real. And her knowledge of chemistry—that actually contributes to her survival and in turn, to the story—it's something that you don't get to see every day. She is kind of a nerd, and jock but then, it would be an insult to her to include her under one banner, which is why I think she is the most influential character I've had the privilege to meet. And her femininity is the cherry on top because for once, I can say that I know a strong character, who is also female—rather than the strong female character.