Ruikasa Oneshots 💫

What I Wanted to Say

ART CREDS!!: https://x.com/ria_rks?t=WaUltPljv3yJq_ltgATOiw&s=09
uhhh I've been wanting to write ruikasa angst for a while now 😭😭

This episode will be angst
TW: Death, murder

Rui POV

As the sky darkened and the birds sang the last of their sweet songs, I fell down onto the dampened ground in front of his grave.

"You'll never know how mad I am at you... There was so much that I wanted to tell you." I started, my voice echoing through the night.

My eyes threatened to spill tears, but I gulped and tried my best to hold them back. I hoped that somehow he'd hear me, somehow he'd understand how I felt.

I raised a hand up to my necklace and gripped it tightly. Taking in a shaky breath, I continued, "I know there's no point in telling you this now... but I can't hold it back. You'll never know what you did to me, Tsukasa. You showed me how to be brave and what it feels like to be loved."

Both of my hands reached behind my neck and I unlatched the necklace. I looked at it, glimmering in the tender moonlight. As I lowered it onto the dirt of his grave, I felt a small sense of relief.

My lips curved up into a faint smile. "I've never been good at showing it, but I've always loved you... I wish that you were here to tell me how you feel." I was just slightly aware of how much I was crying.

For once, I didn't feel embarrassed about my emotions. It all felt natural, as miserable as I was. "And I still love you. I won't ever forget how much you helped me." I raised my hand and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand.

I really do love you.

~~
A week later
~~

It was hard. It was really hard to live without the person you loved the most. We tried to make our shows just as energetic and positive as before, but without our leader, things were a mess.

All three of us were tired and stressed out. Each time I looked at my script, I'd think about what he would say.

"Haha~! I'll be sure to nail my lines for the perfect show!"

..

None of us had that energy. It would be simply impossible to replicate it, because his glistening smile, upright posture, and hearty tone were his. Not ours. No matter how much effort we put into the performances, without Tsukasa, it was as if toddlers were trying to pull it off.

Humiliating, if anything. I scoffed at the paper in my hand, frustrated with myself. It was so upsetting that my mind kept reminding me of him. Tsukasa isn't here, and he never will be. I just...

My lips began to quiver, causing me to frown and rest my head on my desk. I wish he was. There's so much I wanted to do with him... I closed my eyes and took in a wavy breath, trying to eliminate any tears from escaping the binds of my lids.

The last time I saw him, he was at my place. We were having a sleepover with the girls, snacking, playing games, and goofing off. How had things gone so wrong so quickly?

That night, he got a call from his mother saying that he had to go home. Naturally, I immediately offered to walk home with him, but he denied it.

He told me it was dangerous. If he knew it was dangerous, why would he go by himself? It was so late... I should've just went with him. I could've saved his life. I wanted to scream, wail, get any sound out of my body, but I just couldn't. I felt weaker than ever.

Some bastard had taken my best friend, my partner, my lover, and completely ruined him. That boy, that happy, beautiful boy lost his life in the hands of a terrible person. A person that deserved nothing. I will find that person and do to them what they did to him. Tsukasa didn't deserve it.

My tears pooled under my face, drenching my shirt and desk. He should be here right now, doing what he loves.

That night, I learned the most important lesson I ever would. Horrible people do horrible things to incredible people. There's nothing you can do to change the past, you simply grieve and move on.

Tsukasa... I won't forget you. Although you never got to make it, you are a star. A star to me, your friends, and your family. You're our star.

♡~♡~♡~♡

Just some light angst to see how I feel about it currently 😼😼

Uh this one's alright, but I have something that I'm really excited to post because I think it's actually good 😻 please look forward!!
Anyways, tysm for reading! 💖