REQUESTS ARE CLOSED
Designed a new character but want to know others thoughts on it? Want to get some tips on how to make a good character or to be pointed in the right direction? Well, you're in the right place! I'm here to check your guys' OCS an...
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She sounds interesting I suppose. Her type isn't exactly uncommon in this community and I don't exactly find her scary, so maybe try uping the fear factor and adding to her in that sense. I think that you could also add some more traits to her personality to flesh her out more and make her feel like a real person.
Also I don't mind sexuality being brushed over in creepypasta, it doesn't really matter and bugs me when love interests are a part of everything.
Relationships
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These work I guess, however she does feel like a common creepypasta oc. A young adult that kills people isn't hard to find, so definitely add some more unique traits. I do applaud you on her having realistic friendships with others though.
Backstory
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This is pretty short do definitely develop it further and add more to it. There is clearly a trope of mental illness here so you need to research different types of mental illness and show the symptoms. I'm not quite sure why looking after sheep would cause her to stop sleeping and for her to suddenly insomnia? Whilst this can lead to other things, it'll have to be incredibly severe for her to get to the point where she murders her own father. You need to look over all of this and apply more real life logic so that it works and flows better.
Other
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The psychology thing only really works if she studied it, so maybe add that to the backstory. She'll probably have to have had some training because scythes aren't the easiest instrument to yield, so also add her using it in the fields before all this maybe? I think the killing method is okay since it would be scary to be in that situation. However, it's pretty common in this fanbase so it isn't scary to hear about.
Good theme song choices though.
Stats
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Stats are balanced so I don't have any issue here.
Final thoughts I think this could be a decent creepypasta character but I think you need to add more unique and scary traits to this character. Just focus on developing her further really and she should be pretty good.
*My critiques are simply at your request and to help improve your character. It is not my intention to cause any offence and you, of course, do not have to listen to what I've said. This is all just a bit of fun and I apologise if I have done any kind of damage*
