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Parallel

Author :: akirayod

Reviewer :: wuwtaetae

Title :: Parallel

Cover :: 4/10

The background looks pretty, the font fits very well but I'm just not a fan of how it looks overall. The Taekook picture you chose doesn't go well with the background. At all. Even though the cover isn't the best, I can very well say that it goes well with the sci-fi element of the story. I just think that you should get a new cover cause this one isn't it. It isn't very pleasing to the eye even though it could catch some attention. I think you should just remove Taekook from the cover or replace it with another picture as this one doesn't fit. The cover makes it look like it's a future based book with aliens around than an alternate universe. It shouldn't be like that as first impressions are really important if you want to gain reads in Wattpad. You can even order from our graphic shop if you decide to change your cover!

Title :: 4/5

Your title is a little mysterious, to be honest. It's intriguing. It made me want to read and understand what kind of parallel you meant. The name might be a little common but it's interesting. Ever since I read the name, it's been running in my mind a little. I love how it matches the book so well, but I just feel like this isn't the perfect fit. It's kind of a little, just a little dry for a sci-fi whereas it would've been perfect for a romance book as it would've been more mysterious. As the first impression gives out that the book is sci-fi, the name parallel just gives out that the book is going to be all about alternative universes and science.

Synopsis :: 6/10

First and foremost, I think that you should've added the quote from the cover, "worlds apart, the heart is one." Interesting quotes always bring in readers. It's all about these little tricks in Wattpad, you know? I also think that it's a little confusing, the way you've worded things on your blurb. Also, the dialogues you've written in the blurb weren't mentioned in the book at all! Why write them if they aren't a part of your book? With better wording, your synopsis could attract more readers and just be better in general. I suggest you change it up a little and sum up everything.

Plot :: 26/30

Well, I really, really, really love the plot. Honestly, I rarely ever give out more than twenty five when it comes to plots as originality matters to me but your plot was so original that it drew my attention immediately. It definitely isn't very planned out though. Some things were just confusing. Like you said Taehyung was a forensic scientist in your blurb but suddenly he's experimenting with growth formulas on baby rats? What does it have to do with forensic sciences? Also, it felt a little rushed in my opinion. I missed the build of the story. The build usually makes everything make more sense and just adds perfection to the story, it makes books interesting. But your book lacked that build and it's such a disappointment, really as if your plot was well executed it could easily be one of the best Taekook fanfictions out there.

Character development :: 4/10

I don't think you developed the characters that much. Some things they do at times don't make sense. Like how's Taehyung working alone, only Jimin by his side in Harvard? Doesn't he have assistants and Ph.D. students assisting him with his project? How does one phone call get them all the funds? Do you even know how hard it is for people to receive funds for stuff like these? Especially since Taehyung wants to work on a very fictional project. Also, I remember Jimin saying that Taehyung forgets to sleep but that's not physically possible. Also, the way Taehyung celebrates victories, he just doesn't celebrate at all. Like even if he doesn't celebrate, the university or the state would, even if that doesn't happen here. I like Taehyung though, he's a little weird here. Jeongguk is a little confusing in the book as he doesn't want to take up these projects at first but then he suddenly agrees with Namjoon and is like yeah, I'll take care of it. I also find it a little confusing how Jeongguk asked, "like what you see?" and the way Taehyung blushed. Like yes, Jeongguk has a good body and he can show it off but he's supposed to be confused. He's literally in another universe without anybody by his side. I think it'd be great if you just plan your characters more thoroughly.

Writing style :: 7/10

It isn't the best I've seen, but not the worst either. You've kept your words simple and readable by pretty much anybody. I just feel like there isn't much description about anything really, like the portal, Taehyung's lab, Harvard, about Taehyung, or even Jeongguk. I couldn't really understand the characters with the lack of description so I couldn't feel what they felt. Writing just gets bland without emotions in it. Describe everything more and let your book build. You'll be fine!

Overall ::
Honestly, I love the plot. With proper execution, it'd be mind blowing. Don't rush things, it doesn't matter how fast things happen, it's more about how connected the readers are with the book, what they feel when they read. I'd honestly love to see this book get better so if you need any help don't hesitate to pm me! Good luck!

Total :: 66/100

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