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My Ex

Author : 3shnavbts

Reviewer : rinology

My Ex

Cover (5/10)

The cover isn't powerful itself to get you readers. The title and the subtitle are written in the same font, so I suggest to use two different fonts. Also, the picture you chose for your cover seems irrelevant to me. Taehyung looks cheerful, but in the story, he's cold or something like that. So choose a picture that portrays his character properly, or is at least close to his character.

Title (2/5)

The title is mundane. If anyone reads the title and the description, then the whole plot is almost exposed to them. Also, the title isn't unique, it's really common. The title should make the readers feel the urge to read it, but it failed to accomplish that goal. Try to choose an original and relevant title.

Synopsis (4/10)

I think the description revealed too much of the plot and it's supposed to be tempting, but it's nowhere near tempting. I found a few punctuation marks that have been used in the wrong places which changed the speech. It needs to be improved.

Plot (15/30)

Firstly, I didn't find the plot interesting. I read all chapters, but I still couldn't understand the plot. A major twist popped out of the blue and uprooted the whole story. The twist should be related to the story, but this twist seemed really unnecessary. The story is supposed to be angsty, i guess, but instead, it turned into a horror story. Putting a twist shouldn't change the story drastically.

Characters (3/10)

Dear, I never get the chance to know the characters. I managed to get a hint of their personalities, but I didn't see any character development. I'm confused, is Taehyung good or bad there? I mean I couldn't know the characters even after reading nearly ten chapters. Do you even know their personality yourself?

Grammar (18/25)

I found many mistakes and the punctuation marks need to be placed correctly. Punctuation marks don't make that much of an effect, but if you use comma too often and in the wrong places, then it can change the meaning of the sentence. Also, too many commas are quite noticeable.

Writing style (3/10)

I didn't like the writing style. Firstly, you explained Y/N's daily life repeatedly. You don't have to tell the story of the everyday morning, it bores the readers. You use two povs in a chapter. Readers sometimes lost track and become confused as to why a particular sentence is written from another pov. You aren't supposed to confuse the readers. Use just one pov in one chapter and you will be good. Sometimes you added too many unnecessary details. The story was fast-paced as well. Also, change the chapter titles. They don't seem good at all, so I suggest that use either numbers or words that matches the chapter and doesn't reveal too much.

Overall

Add details, but don't add the unnecessary details. You should focus on describing the scenes instead of telling. Showing the readers will affect rather than telling. You need to develop the plot slowly and the characters. Everything needs to be improved. Also, you shouldn't have revealed their crushes in the introduction chapter. I talked about all the issues above and now it depends on you, if you remove those issues, then i think this will be a good book. Practise and read some good books. I'm sure you will be able to write a good book.

Review Score = 50/100

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