Breaking promises

79. Better than me

"You've changed her," my brother pointed out to Blake, who cast me an intense glance.

"How So?" He asked curiously.

I looked at my brother with furrowed brows. What is he talking about? I'm still me...

"She used to spend all of her time alone in her room, reading books and talking to her imaginary friends," he said.

"I wasn't talking to imaginary friends," I scoffed, but both Derek and Blake didn't even listen to me.

"She was shy, awkward, but now with you she seems really strong and confident."

This was like a confidence boost to Blake, as he smirked at me and gave me a slight nudge. "It seems that I've rubbed on you, mia regina."

I playfully rolled my eyes at him and pushed him slightly.

"She was already opening up to me, when we spent that one weekend here," Seb pointed out, causing Blake to freeze in a tense position.

And now I was begging in my head, that they won't start analyzing whose dick is bigger.

"She felt content in my arms, when I hugged her and she talked to me more than she did before. Maybe I was the one who started the change in her," he pointed out.

I looked at Blake and saw him looking at Seb with a sinister smile. "Oh yeah? The only change that you started was getting her become insecure and wary of guys, that could show her true affections. I bet she still thinks that I'll run off with another chick, because you did that to her. The only thing that you did, was break her and I've managed to get some pieces of her back together and I won't stop until she is whole again. You truly most be stupid to think that you've been a positive aspect of her life, because you've been nothing but a leech."

I looked at Blake with my mouth hanging open like a fish out of water. I couldn't disagree with Blake, but at the same time it felt kinda bad hearing it from someone else. I always thought that these thoughts would always remain in the deepest parts of my mind, but Blake knows me like the back of his hand. And the fact that he's trying to help me, even though I was broken, makes me love him even more.

Wait!

I love him?

Oh god, I love him. When did I start loving him?

Well to be honest, not loving this guy would be completely impossible. He has been the perfect guy for me. I don't deserve him.

I looked at him and felt his arm sneaking around my waist, embracing me. I don't deserve him. I don't deserve him. I don't.

"What's wrong?" Blake asked me and I shook my head. This is wrong. He shouldn't be with me, he should be with someone better. Someone prettier, smarter, stronger, more talented. Someone who would be just as perfect as him.

I almost wanted to laugh at this. How could I be so selfish? I've had him to myself all this time and he is trying so hard for me. I've been using him to heal. He's been my medicine and that's no way a relationship will work.

Maybe he only wants to be with me, because of the kindness of his heart. Maybe he feels obligated to help a damsel in distress, to move past someone who hurt them. What if he decides I'm not worth it?

"Hailey?" Blake asked, worry lacing his voice.

"Hmm?" I asked and he forced my chin up, so that he could look into my eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asked me once again.

"Not now," I whispered and he looked at me intently, as if he was searching for the answers, when he finally let me go.

"I'm actually curious," Blake started. "What was your plan?"

"What plan?" Sebastian asked.

"The plan with Hailey. You say that you care about her, more than friends, but you've never gone after her. You might notice the disagreement between both statements. You can't say that you like her, only to break her heart multiple times," Blake said coldly. "I'm kinda glad, that you were stupid enough to let her go, but I'm just interested what game were you playing."

"I wasn't playing a game. I was in love with Hailey, she just didn't notice that."

I felt Blake's chest rumbling in laughter, when he finally let out the barking laughter, "Yeah, i wonder why she didn't notice your affection towards her. I don't know, must be the fact that you stuck your tongue in every living organism."

Seb was about to shoot something back, when I interrupted that stupid argument, "enough! I don't want to hear this anymore. What's the point of all of this? I'm with Blake know, that's it. Past isn't going to change and I don't care about that shit anymore."

I looked at Seb to see him sporting a hurt expression on his face. I thought that me and him agreed to be friends, nothing more...

"Alright, I'm going to head off to sleep," my brother said, awkwardly standing up. Seb followed him shortly after, not even muttering a word, leaving me and Blake alone.

"We should probably head off to bed too," I said, standing up and dragging him with me.

We walked to our bedroom and I opened the door and lazily walked to my bed, dropping down from the tiredness.

"Do you want me to help you?" Blake asked and I nodded my head, too tired to care about him seeing me half naked.

I felt him unbuckling my pants and slowly pulling them off my legs. He then took of my socks, my jumper, leaving me in my underwear. Then for a moment there was nothing happening and I had a strange feeling that he was checking me out, but he proved that statement wrong, when he pulled me up, to put on his shirt on me.

"Thank you," I murmured sleepily.

"You're welcome," he replied. He then picked me up and dragged me further into the bed and wrapped his arms around me, making a cage of warmth and security around me.

"Wanna tell me what was on your mind earlier?" He asked and I shook my head.

"Later," I muttered. He let the subject drop.

I knew that I would never confess my true thoughts, as maybe I should let him go. He deserves better than me.