YOU & ME | JENLISA

Chapter 37

Lisa

Graphite against paper was a soul destroying sound when you had managed to avoid snorting or smoking anything all day and your irritability levels were high. I couldn't concentrate on the assignment given to me yet everyone else seemed to be filling in their worksheets no problem.

Don't think about the drugs.

Don't think about the drugs.

Don't think about the drugs.

Sam gave me some heavy shit, coming down from it was epically hard. I don't want to go to that place again. Plus I was alone with Jennie, putting myself at risk because I had no witnesses and nothing recording us.

I glanced her way, she had her hand clutched around the pencil and silver rings glared against the light. Her lips silently moved as she read back whatever she was writing, they looked soft, pink and kissable. Her hair today was straight, not wavy like she usually wears it. She tossed it over her shoulder and it flowed like dark, elegant, glossy silk down her back. I wanted to touch it, run my fingers through it as I kissed her.

She nibbled on her lower lip and flicked the pencil in her hand, troubled by one of the questions, I think. I leaned forward and rested my head sloppily on my hand. Is it ridiculously weird to just sit here staring at her all during lesson because I don't feel like I can stop myself. She leaned over to see Lucas' paper and then quickly started writing back on her own page again. I spluttered a laugh, the little cheat!

Unexpectedly she turned to face me, my eyes widened and I sat up straight. Her little pink lips curled into a shy smile and I fought the urge to look behind me just to check it was actually me she was smiling at. That small gesture sent me on a Jennie-high, my insides came alive with so many endorphins and I gave her a shy smile back.

God, I'm so fucking lame. Why can't I get the words out that I want to say to her. It's like I turn to jelly whenever I'm around her and she makes me too completely and utterly star struck to function. I have it bad, completely besotted with her and one day, one day soon I'm gonna tell her how I feel. I've been practicing. The bell rang for second period, she flipped over her paper and gathered up her things. I hadn't wrote a single thing all lesson. Shit.

I quickly packed up my stuff and went to my locker, computer lab was up next and I didn't need any of my books for that so I offloaded them but noticed a small zip lock baggie in my locker half-filled with white dust. I stopped completely still, making eye contact with this white bag.

It called out to me like the ocean calls Moana, Satan had put it in my path and now all I could think about was splitting it into lines on the metal base of my locker and stiffing it up. My fingers twitched so I balled them up into fists, shaking with a desperate yearning to sate the inner addicted voice.

I looked around for someone, anyone to help. A teacher maybe or a guidance councillor. Someone to stop me. To help me. Anyone. There was a small group of kids huddled further down the corridor. I grabbed the bag, closed my locker and headed towards them.

"Hey, here." I held out the bag to the small nerdy-looking guy. He looked at my hand and his brows knitted together behind black framed glasses. "Please, take it. Flog it, flush it. I don't care, just get it away from me." He looked at his friends, they were girls and all three of them looked like they were part of the chess club. None of them made any efforts to take it from me. "Please." I begged as a last resort. But they said nothing and did nothing, so I held the bag tighter in my hand and admitted defeat, making my way to the restrooms.

"That's the one who raped a girl." I heard them whisper behind my back.

I flung the doors open aggressively and a guy washing his hands at the sink glanced up at me startled.

"You got a dinner card?" I growled at him.

"Uhh... y... yeah." he stammered out.

"Give it to me." He started to search through his pockets but not fast enough. "Fucking give it to me, hurry up!" He was all fingers and thumbs as he handed it over, almost dropping it onto the floor twice. I tipped the powder onto an even surface and started gathering it into lines. "Fuck off!" I said to his gawking eyes.

The door sprung open on its hinge and my eyes lifted from the powder to meet with Jennie's best friend. She looked down at the powder and then up at me.

"This is not the bathroom for you, Rosé." The random guy told her. She held her middle finger up at him and marched over to me. She took the dinner card out of my hand and gave it back.

"Get the fuck out of here, Lewis!" I watched him scurry off with no hesitation. She smiled at me but I could see the fear in her eyes. "I have pepper spray in my pocket and a knife." She warned me. "But I've just seen you talking to those guys out there, asking them for help and they didn't..." she glanced down at the lines of coke waiting to be inhaled. "You don't want to do this."