YOU & ME | JENLISA

Chapter 74

Lisa

Yes. I wanted to be hugged by her so bad, to collapse into her arms and lay some of my problems on her. I wanted to tell her what I had to endure last night and how it made me feel dirty and violated. I wanted to nuzzle my head into her neck and smell the sweet almond scent of her shampoo. I wanted Jennie to comfort me and be there for me. Instead, I shook my head, sniffled and wiped away my tears.

"No, I'm okay. Thanks Jennie, she'll really like this, you better go." I walked over to the door and held it open with my foot. She hesitated and I cocked a brow.

"Have you got any more drugs on you?" I shook my head, but I had another small baggie in my pocket. I couldn't bring myself to tell her that because now that I had come this close to relapsing, I wanted it more than ever. She walked over to me, and kept her eyes on mine, trying to scope out the truth.

She dipped her hand into the pocket of my jeans and my whole body stiffened as she brushed up against my dick. She yanked the small bag of powder out and clutched it in her palm.

"Don't lie to me again." She warned.

Guilt and shame washed over me all over again, it's all I seemed to be feeling today. "I'm sorry." I whispered.

This time she walked through the door, but stopped on the top step and turned around to face me.

"Wait, Lisa there's something else."

I pondered over her face, this time she was the one who wore a guilty expression. She came back to the rooftop and grabbed my hand, pulling me away from the door so that it slammed to a close. Immediately, I felt nervous to be alone with her. She took a deep breath and fished into her bag for something else, pulling out a brown folder.

"Don't tell me that's dance homework because I don't get paid enough for that shit."

She shook her head. "It's not."

"Then what is it?" I was starting to feel anxiety inside, I don't know why. It was just building up like a panic attack was coming.

"It's your criminal record."

I laughed, only a small reflex laugh. I didn't connect the dots at first, I thought it was some kind of joke. But then I remembered, her dad is the sheriff.

"Did you steal that?"

"No... I... uh, my dad. He knows that we're hanging out and he wants me to read it."

Arrest after arrest. Drugs. Fights. Theft. Rape allegations. She can't read this. Shit, what if she already has?

"He can't do that, can he? That's a breach of my rights. That's against the law. Did you read this? Fuck, I'll sue that fucking corrupt cop into the ground." Anger bubbled up inside of me, I wanted to punch my knuckles into the brickwork.

No, I didn't. I just wanted the cocaine back. I wanted to push Jennie up against the wall and prise the small bag from her hand. I didn't care if I hurt her. I didn't care if I scared her. I just wanted the fucking drugs.

"Lisa, you're speaking about my dad."

I don't fucking care. My dream girl just got handed every offensive thing that I've ever done in one convenient folder. It's my word against the law, or rather my word against her dad's. She'll never look at me the same way again. She'll never believe me.

"He was just trying to look out for me. I haven't read it but he expects me to and I don't think he's gonna let me continue to hang out with you, unless I read it."

"So, what do you want Jennie, huh? Permission? This file, it's personal. It's really fucking personal."

"I know, I know that." She took it out of my hand and put it back in her bag. "I told him that too. Please don't worry about this, I'm not going to read it without your permission. I want you to be the one to show it to me, if and when you're ready. I'm on your side, I know whatever is in this, it isn't you."

"So what? You're just gonna walk around school with that thing in your bag all day?" Her lips parted slightly and she looked down at her bag in dismay. I took a deep breath. "It's my life Jennie, I don't want you showing that thing to Rosé or anyone."

"I would never do that."

"Okay, fine. Tonight. Not here, not at school and whatever you read, whatever is in that file; it stays between you and me."

"Okay."