YOU & ME | JENLISA

Chapter 31

Lisa

I was running on caffeine, cocaine and an hour's worth of sleep. Yes, I relapsed if I can even call it that. I only managed to keep the drugs out of my system for three days. Then, I yet again sold my soul to the devil and fucked someone that I didn't want to fuck, just for money.

Zoe, the beautiful doctor from Seoul slithered up the bed resting her bare breasts against my body, she buried her nose deep into my armpit and breathed in the masculine scent of my post-gym work out. Zoe was a regular. I never took her to dinner, she paid to watch me work out in the gym. Then she got her sexual gratification from smelling my sweat and licking my salty body in non-intimate areas. She came to me because she's ashamed of her fetish. I can't afford to kink shame her, I've seen it all. Heard it all. Maybe even done it all.

"Just tell him, he might be into it." I encouraged as we lay on the bed next to one another. I sparked up a cigarette and we passed it back and forth between us both.

"Lisa I can't, it's too new. I don't want to scare him off." She breathed out smoke and then passed the cigarette back. "Hey, what kind of things are you into?" She asked, with curiosity burning a blue fire in her eyes.

My brows furrowed, I've never been asked that question. I've never even thought about it. I just do whatever they want me to, our time together is for them, not me. I answered with the first thing that came to mind.

"Nothing really and at the same time everything. I guess the only real thing that I'm into, is doing it with the right girl, however way that happens." She stretched her limbs out on the bed and smiled in a sated way. "What would the right girl say about all of this?" I licked the rough dent on my lower lip, again another question that didn't cross my mind before now. It never needed to, the right girl would never find out about this.

Suddenly, I felt Zoe's eyes assessing my facial expressions and this conversation was turning more intimate than what I was comfortable with.

"I'm heading out." I stumped the cigarette out on a glass ashtray and dressed in my clothes, craving a hot shower before Sam's party. Tonight I was gonna score big, Sam throws these parties every few months. The drugs are everywhere, free for all. It has one purpose, to get people hooked and when they're hooked they'll know exactly who to go back to, for the blow.

Trouble is, Sam doesn't care who he gets hooked on these drugs. I was still in middle school when I first attended one of his parties. Freshly twelve and handed a big bag of blow for free. He showed me how to use it and hung with me like I was one of the cool kids.

Admittedly, the cocaine pulled me in more than the seller. I fell in love with it, on the first try. I had been living in darkness for the year prior, my mom had been diagnosed as terminal and Bryan was back on the scene making my life hell. Cocaine took it all away from me, especially back then.

I zipped up my hoodie and jogged back home, I showered off my body and sat with my mom as we had our lunch. She seemed better today, her throat not seeming as dry, her lungs not working as hard.

'Outside', Bambam's text read.

He was standing, scuffing dirt around with the side of his shoe. I gave him a head nod greeting and he returned it. He wore a red and black buffalo print lumberjack shirt and grey jeans that made his thighs very shapely.

"How was B.O Zoe?" I smirked at him.

"I told you that in confidence." He let out a horse-like laugh.

"You told me that cause you were drunk out of your mind." True.