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Ways of Looking at a Cicada [Nika]

Book: Ways of Looking at a Cicada 
Author: ftnrdake
Reviewer: Nikachu22
Number of chapters read: 8
[First 5. "My Old Home". "The Path of Dao" IV and V.]

Main focus: Everything, but mostly on pacing and character portrayal.

Cover/Blurb/Title:
First things first, the cicada on your cover is blurry even as I look at it from my laptop. What might work is going to Pinterest and finding a more precise picture to your liking but I'd stick with the idea you have now of the cicada being a little cartoon-looking because, to be honest, Cicadas are scary-looking. Using an actual image I don't think would be pleasant on the eyes. The title and font as you have it now, but I'd suggest removing the repeating Cicada word.

Your title is already long so the repeating word to me is unnecessary. If you're looking for ways to fill in the space, then I'd suggest adding something like a quote from the book just to give the readers a feel of what they're dealing with without reading the blurb.

In the blurb take out the entire first sentence and that little funny emoji and begin with the solid paragraph you have. End the blurb at the dialogue "Love..?"

This adds to the mystery because now it forces the reader to click on the book. That paragraph is a great hook in itself, but the icing on the cake is the dialogue in which we get to see her personality unfold just a little bit. You'd be surprised by the small things.

The rest of the dialogue is unnecessary in my opinion and if it's in the story then that is actually good. Let that carry itself in the chapters.

Remove the other emoji.

Everything else is fine.

(Side note) I must ask, but didn't the MC bring over cookies? I'm unsure where the cookies have gone because they are no longer mentioned. Did Carmella take them?

Character Portrayal:
Chapter 1:
I found that the character's portrayal was a little bit lacking. The reason I say this is because you allowed the character's voices to describe how they were feeling without telling us so that we could relate to them.

I know you did mention her having a racing heartbeat but what would also help is incorporate facial movements or body movements. Let's take the scene where Carmilla is walking towards her. I'm sure this scene is quite intimidating and the only hint we received of the MC's uncomfortableness was "W-what are you doing?"

Elaborate on that speech to bring her out more.

As her glassy eyes stare at the approaching slender figure, a sudden uptick in her heart rocks the tips of her fingers. She clamps down on the tray of cookies, positioning them in front of her as a calming shield. Her eyes are focused, she's looking rapidly around the woman in amazement at how tall she is becoming with every tap of her stilettos.

A sharp inhale from the Mc, breath caught in her lungs. Her anticipation for the weird and unpredictable opens the door that she was right about the neighbor. The woman closes the gap between them and the MC is left with her back pressed against a cold wall.

She shudders as lifeless, interested eyes find curious dance around her features in what seems to be an amusing pleasure. The silence between them is shared. MC's mouth is parted, confusion riddling her expression and her eyebrows are furrowed. It isn't until a soft voice takes her worry away.

So I usually write in third person. Up above, I just described the situation with a little bit more emotion. I can get carried away so I'll end the encounter short. Also, I think a little more emotion is needed when she first enters the home.