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A Kingdom of Tales [Vi]

Book: A Kingdom of Tales
Author: sleepytinker5757
Reviewer: WarmCupofSparkles12
Chapters read: 2

Chapter 1
Pacing: 9/10
Starting off with someone getting chased by bounty hunters is a nice hook.

Characters: 9/10
I like how the protagonist enjoys being outside, having had Alana tell her that her etiquette lesson would be in the garden. From this, I will assume that our protagonist is a lady of royalty of some kind. She has these servants that lead her to and do activities with her, from etiquette to fishing.

World building: 7/10
I’d like a description of Telmor’s city if that’s possible. I’d like to know what it looks like. And I also like the clarity of your writing. With only a few words, we can feel like we’re in her shoes.

Chapter 2
Pacing: 9/10
It’s nice. I enjoyed reading this chapter, and I swear I could’ve smelled a possible ship from 400 miles away. Jasmine and Miles??? Back on topic, it’s a nice steady tempo. I enjoyed it.

Characters: 9/10
So this new guy Bastian. … So far, he’s cool. His description is nice, yet I want to know what color his eyes and hair are. And I feel bad for the protagonist. Having learned she’s been in seclusion for a lot of her time is kinda sad. She needs a hug and I’m more than willing to give her one. And what did she do to get a bounty on her head?

World building: 8/10
I find it confusing that we’re seeing this guy Bastian first and then we’re somehow woken up? It would be easier if you made it seem like a flashback or whatever it was before changing it to the present time. Just saying. 🙂

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