Saviors [A SVU and Bensler Fan Fic]

[Chapter One-Hundred-Eighteen]

"You can't talk to Allen Channing, Liv!" John yelled at me, and I stared at him as I balled my hands into fists.

"John, he killed my mother! He hurt my daughter!" I cried, and he shook his head.

"Get the hell out of my stationhouse, Detective! I swear to god if you don't get out, I will have you suspended till you are older than I am!" John yelled. I kicked one of the chairs as I walked out, and I headed towards my desk. I grabbed my stuff and my husband yelled after me but I ignored him too.

If I didn't get out, I'd probably have a better chance of being a janitor in the stationhouse instead of a detective anymore.

I ran right to the stairs and tried to take them two at a time, but when the tears started to well in my eyes, I started to stumble a bit I ended up just sitting on the landing in a corner as I sobbed. I wasn't really crying about getting kicked out. I was crying about how I wasn't allowed to be working the case that could give me the closure I didn't know if I would ever have.

[*]

When I was driving home, I got a call from Mary's school, and they told me she had been suspended for the next two weeks for beating up another student. So I drove to the high school, and cleaned up my makeup before heading inside.

"Mrs. Stabler, Mary is in the ISS room. Principal Gomez is finishing up his meeting with the other student's parents, and he'll call you in soon." Ms. London spoke, and I nodded.

"Can I go see her?" I asked, and she nodded. I walked towards the two small rooms. I remember having to bring Elliot his homework into these rooms when we were in high school. He was in here so often it was more like this was his scheduled classes than the ones he got kicked out of.

"Okay, Mary, wanna tell me why I get a call to come get you because you knocked out another student?" I asked, and my daughter didn't even look up at me. She was just laying with her head against the table.

"Mary, tell me why you did that. Now." I ordered, and she spun around. I saw a few bloody scratches on her face.

"Because you made me go to school today!" Mary yelled, and I laughed bitter.

"I was going to call you in, but then you yelled at me. Mary, next time you decide to get into a fight, have it be for a real reason. Not just because you were angry at me for something you insisted on!" I spat, and she stood up and shoved me. I wrapped my arms tightly around her and held her close.

"Let me go!" She screamed, but I just held her until she finally let her walls down for the first time since Serena died.

"Mary you didn't have to come to school today! Geez, just tell me what happened!" I breathed, as I rubbed her back.

"People just make me angry, Mom! People just make me so angry that I want to punch their stupid fucking faces!" Mary yelled.

"I know, darling. But this can't happen. For the next two weeks, you are going to do nothing but work on your homework, do chores, and help me with the funeral. Okay?"

"Okay. I'm sorry, Mom."

"Yeah, tell that to the girl you beat up."

"It was a boy." Mary replied.

"You beat up a boy? Mary, no wonder you got two weeks. He must be so fucking embarrassed." I laughed.

[*]

I went home after Mary and I talked to the principal. I explained what happened and what caused her to be so angry. We explained how my mother died and who the man was who killed her. It was a big thing, but the principal said that Mary could come back after only a week off as long as she did the group grief therapy that they were holding at the school.

"So, are you hungry? You missed lunch while you were shut in the same ISS room that your father carved his name into." I smiled, as we walked into the house.

"It's still carved into the table, Mom. I was tracing that while I was waiting for you to come and get me. But I'm not really hungry. I'm just gonna go up to my room." Mary spoke. I grabbed her hand and held it as I pulled her through the house and then up the stairs. She looked at me as we stopped outside of the room my mother had been staying in.

"I haven't opened the door since she died. I know it's only been a day since she passed, but I can't go in here alone. And, either we go in her quietly so we don't wake your Aunt, sister, and brother, or we wake them up and go in all together." I breathed, and she reached out and turned the doorknob. We walked in together and quickly shut the door behind us. It kept the smell of my mother's perfume in the room instead of letting it spread out into nothingness.

"Her perfume smelt horrible all the time, but now it doesn't smell nasty. It smells nice." Mary whispered, and I nodded.

"Yeah. It smells like her and that's all that matters." I replied. I walked over and sat on the edge of the bed and took a slow breath. My daughter joined me. I wrapped my arm around her waist and drew her close before closing my eyes tightly. I didn't want to start crying again, but it was hard not to.

The door opened and closed after a few short moments, and Chris climbed onto my lap while Cynthia sat on the other side of Mary and held Meredith on her lap.

"We all have to support each other, okay? No more fighting about stupid family shit. From now on we are one sound unit who are going to support each other and love each other. Because I spent too much time away from my mother to only lose her."

"Deal." Chris whispered, and I laughed softly as I leaned down and kissed his hair.

"Good. Now I love you all to freaking much."

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