Saviors [A SVU and Bensler Fan Fic]

[Chapter Eighteen]

I walked into the house, and it was completely silent. No one was awake, not even Elliot. I locked the front door before taking my jacket off and hanging it up. I slipped my shoes off so they wouldn't squeak as I walked but the stairs, before heading towards the room I share with Elliot.

I opened the door and walked into the room. Elliot was sleeping on his stomach, and he snored loudly. Did no one care if I was okay? Or did they just assume I had been arrested for assaulting the bitch who hurt me for 7 years of my life?

I climbed onto the air mattress, and as I tried to get comfortable because I was even too exhausted to get changed, my boyfriend sat up.

"Liv? You're home!" He exclaimed, as he scrambled out of  his bed and quickly helped me out of my bed and drew me to his body. I clung to him as I started to cry again.

"Oh Liv, love, what happened?" He questioned, as he rubbed my back gently.

"I can't do this anymore!" I sobbed, as I clung to him tighter.

"Do what? Olivia what is happening?" He asked, as he tired to get as much out of me as possible between my sobs.

"I can't try and pretend that my parents adopting Cynthia is good. I can't try and forget that Serena tried to hurt me again. I can't try and hide the fact that I'm scared of her still! After 10 years I'm still scared of her! I'm not a kid anymore!" I sobbed, before stepping back from Elliot and starting to pace the room.

My breathing got quicker and I was starting to hyperventilating. I don't get panic attacks that often anymore, but this one was scaring me and it made me panic even more.

"Olivia! Calm down! You are going to make yourself sick!" Elliot exclaimed, as he reached out to stop me, but I just continued to pace.

"Make them stop, Elliot! Make them all go away! Please!" I screamed, which woke up the whole house. Elliot was overwhelmed, so he just backed up and leaned against the wall. The door swung open and Joseph and Bernie ran in. Bernie wrapped her arms around me and forced me to stop.

"Olivia, sweetie, deep breaths. You got this. Come on, breath for me."

[*]

I sat in the kitchen with Bernie, Joseph, and Elliot. I was still shaking a bit, but the tea was helping me calm down a bit.

"Sweetie, do you wanna talk to us about all of this?" Bernie asked, as Elliot crossed his arms over his chest and avoided giving me eye contact. I think he might be scared of me, or disgusted by me.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake everyone up. We can go to bed. You guys can go to bed. I'm going to stay up." I whispered, as I sat forward and watched as steam floated above my cup.

"Who did you want Elliot to stop?" Joseph questioned, and I swallowed hard.

"I don't know. I was just tired. I am tired."

Elliot stood up and walked towards the stairs. I jumped up quickly and followed him.

"Elliot, please don't hate me. I'm sorry that I'm crazy." I whispered, and Elliot frowned as he leaned against the railing.

"You aren't crazy. I don't hate you. I just don't know how to feel about this all." He replied.

"Do you want me to leave? I can go stay with my parents." I whispered, and he frowned.

"I think you need help." He admitted, and I swallowed hard before running up the stairs pass him. I went into the room we shared and I started to pack up my stuff.

"God, not tonight." Elliot frowned, and I turned to look at him.

"I'm not crazy, El. I don't need help. I'm just so damn overwhelmed. You'd be just as nervous and panicky as I am." I whispered, and Elliot frowned.

"Liv-"

"I just saw my biological mother for the first time in 10 years. 10 years of me being happy has went down the drain because she tried to stop me. She tried to talk to me." I whispered, and Elliot frowned. He reached out to tuck some hair behind my ear, and I swallowed hard.

"Okay, lets just go to bed." Elliot spoke, as he grabbed my arm and walked me towards his bed.

"We aren't allowed to sleep in the same bed together." I whispered, and he shrugged.

"I don't care. I just want you to sleep, and feel safe for a few minutes." He spoke as he climbed into bed after me. He wrapped his arms around me and caressed my hair as I slowly fell asleep.

[*]

The next morning while I was at work, the cops walked in. I was stocking once again, when Stacy quietly came up next to me.

"Olivia, I need you to come with me." She spoke, and I looked up at her.

"Why? Is Mrs. Friar back? I tal-"

"Olivia, the police are here." She whispered, and I felt my heart start to pound out of my chest.

"No." I whispered, and she frowned.

"Come on. I don't want to make a scene. I just need you to go out there and go with them. I'll call your parents once you leave." She spoke, and tears ran down my cheeks. I handed her the box cutter, before walking towards the front of the store with her.

An officer stood at the front of the store, and when Stacy walked up with me, he removed his handcuffs from their holder and walked over to me.

"Olivia Benson, you are under arrest for assaulting Serena Benson." He spoke, and I felt like my world was completely falling apart. He led me from the store as people talked about it, and as he put me into the squad car, I saw Serena standing next to her car, smiling largely.

[*]

I was searched and my belt, shoe laces, necklace and hair tie were taken from me. My finger prints were taken and I had to get a mugshot done. Then I was forced into a holding cell with a bunch of other women, as I continued to cry quietly.

First she hurts me from the moment I was born to the moment I was taken away, and now she gets me arrested because she was holding onto my arm and I reacted out of fear.

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