Tolerance Book I (Chicago PD/Med FF) by Frances51163

Chapter One Hundred and Forty: Near Breaking Point

Mollys' Restroom

Jay had been relieved to find the restroom empty when he entered.  Quickly splashing cold water on his face he leant over the sink on his good arm.  The thought of any of his friends and family being hurt had always been a constant source of anguish and this unexpected gathering just reinforced all the damage he could do by just being himself. Someone wanted to hurt him but going through his friends would hurt him so much more.  He had thought his team understood that but obviously he had been mistaken. Unbidden images of bloodied bodies began to play across his mind and their faces were all familiar.  Will, Adam, Antonio, Kevin, Conor, Kelly, Casey, Ethan, Herrmann ..... he shook his head to stop the movie and startled when a voice spoke behind him.

"Figured you could use someone to talk to," Sam stood leaning against the closed door with his arms folded, "you want to tell me what's got you so spooked?"
"I'm good," the young man avoided eye contact as he quickly grabbed a sheet of towel to dry his face and hands.
"Somehow I find that hard to believe."
"Yeah well that's not my fault," the injured man tossed the crumpled towel in the bin then headed for the door, "you mind?"
"It's natural to be worried about your friends," the Counsellor didn't budge, "be surprised if you weren't.  Voight and the team took a while to set this up.  They have the place well guarded and everyone came at different times, through the back entrance.  None of your friends and family are in danger here."
"You can't know that!"
"I trust your team and you do too."
"That doesn't mean something bad won't happen," Jay pointed out.
"No but it's less likely to happen tonight.  You've been worrying about your brother, your Unit and your friends for a long time but I have a question for you .....,"
"What?" Jay demanded when nothing further was forthcoming.
"When do you worry about yourself?"
"What do you mean?"
"You've worried about everyone else but clearly not yourself."
"You don't know what you're talking about."
"Before you came tonight I spoke to some of your friends," Sam admitted honestly, "each of them at some point, of their own accord, mentioned that you worried about their safety but not so much about your own."
"You profiling me?" a cold tone crept into the embattled mans' voice.
"No! Like I said your friends volunteered information.  I'm not trying to psycho analyze you Jay," Sam insisted adamantly before continuing gently, "I'm trying to be a friend.  If you'll let me that is."
"Okay," the Detective acknowledged knowing the man was genuine, "now move it."
"I'm a good listener.  You ever feel like talking you ring me.  Anytime, day or night."
"Thanks now move or I'll have to get physical."
"That's a nice way to talk to a friend!" Sam scoffed as he turned to open the door knowing the young man wasn't going to admit he needed help just now but hoping in the future he would.

When Jay exited the restroom he found himself waylaid by Kelly and Casey who brought him over to his brothers' table where he was tugged down onto a seat by a grinning Ethan.

"Your brother has been causing trouble," Kelly divulged, "he's picking on the Blackhawks so we figure you can straighten him out."
"So what have you been saying now?" Jay played along.
"Hey don't shoot the messenger!  I just said they were having a bit of a bad spell," the redhead explained unrepentantly.
"They'll win the next game," Casey defended as he eyed his empty bottle, "another round?"
"I'll get it," Jay went to stand up but was quickly stopped.
"The guest of honour doesn't buy the rounds," Kelly pointed out as Casey and himself turned away from the table, "won't be long."
"It's good to have a night out," Will eyed his sibling.
"There was no need ...," Jay began but was cut off.
"You need a chance to unwind," Conor pointed out, "besides everyone wanted to see you."
"It's too risky."
"Jay Hank and the Unit have everything sorted.  There are people on guard outside.  Everyone came at different times through the back entrance," Ethan explained.
"Take a look around," Will instructed, "what do you see?"
"Friends," the pale man glanced at the crowd, seeing several faces for the first time and shifting uncomfortably on his seat, "they shouldn't have come."
"Well everyone here knows you're worth it," Will spoke knowingly as Kelly and Casey returned with the drinks.
"Jay while I think of it Boden couldn't make it tonight but he said to tell you to drop by the firehouse anytime," Kelly spoke as he handed the quiet man a beer, "he doesn't make that offer to many people."
"Thanks," the Detective ducked his head in embarrassment.
"So who's going to win tomorrow night?" Casey decided on a safe subject to help their friend relax.

An hour later Jay had made his way back to the Benedicts' table.  He had discarded his jacket and sling earlier.  The silent boy communicated easily with facial expressions and his eagerness to go to the injured man as soon as he sat down was obvious.  Jay was easily able to accept the toddler as he was passed over the table by his beaming mother.

"If I had an ego it would be bruised," Adam said with mock chagrin as he walked over to the table and sat down beside his friend eyeing the happy toddler resting on the mans' shoulder.
"Hey he's fussy about who he goes to," Sam shrugged in apology.
"Kid's got good instincts," Jay chided.
"I thought Jay everything I know."
"Hence the hand," Jay held up his splinted hand cheekily.
"What I have to put up with ye'd never believe," Adam noted sadly.
"How long have ye worked together?" Sandy grinned at the ribbing.
"Too long," Jay put in as he shifted the toddler slightly.
"I bet you'd make a good father," Sandy spoke thoughtfully as she sipped some red wine and watched her son nodding off on the young Detectives' shoulder.
"Nah," Jay denied quickly, "our work doesn't make family life easy."
"But surely if you met the right girl you'd settle down."
"Honey not everyone wants to settle down," Sam pointed out knowing his wife would take the hint for he had seen a look of hurt flicker across the Detectives' face when the question was posed.
"Sorry," Sandy apologised sincerely, "I read way too many romantic novels where the dashing hero sails off into the sunset with his girl and lives happily ever after."
"Sam your wife just called Jay a 'dashing hero'.   If you want to take him outside and deal with him I'll loan you my gun," Adam hastily jumped in as his companion blushed.
"Well given he's an excellent shot think I'll decline your offer."
"Wise choice," Jay concurred with a grin after winking at Sandy to let her know there was no harm done, 'now I need to mingle so I'll give this little guy back."
"Would you mind taking him with you?" Sandy asked after sharing a look with her husband.
"Let me guess date night?" Adam looked at the couple.
"This is the first time we've been out together since Mikey was born.  We haven't found any babysitter he likes," Sam noted.
"Well in that case we'll leave ye to it," Jay stood up carefully with his little charge.
"Just keep it PG rated," Adam tossed in a mischevous warning to the couple before he followed his friend over to the bar.

tbc