𝗔𝗶𝗻'𝘁 𝗡𝗼 𝗩𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝘆 𝗟𝗼𝘄 𝗘𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 🤍

•𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 190 🥀

•🌹•   

Y/N's POV, February 11th 1992

The last couple of days something was really really off. I couldn't put my finger exactly on what but there was certainly something. In a way I knew what they'd discussed, it was the only thing which made sense to me but at the same time still didn't want to believe they'd steep that low.

Like I said I would, I hadn't actually asked Nikki what the meeting was about yet still waiting for him to tell me himself but I swear to god if they'd spoken about what I think they have and Nikki hadn't told me about it, I was going to be pissed.

It was even more irritating because any issue they had with Vince can really just be resolved with a long talk, Tommy needs to stop projecting his issues onto Vince and stop taking out his personal frustration out on him and Nikki just needs to sit and have a long talk with Vince about me and how Vince wouldn't ever make any kind of move on me. It could all be resolved in a few hours if they just communicated with one another and spoke about things like they did way way back in the day in the early days of the band.

They all used to talk back then, they could solve any issues they had, things were so much simpler but things over the years seem to have devolved and egos are now too big and too precious to everyone that they're too proud to admit they're wrong and fix the wrongs.

They wouldn't talk now even if their lives depended on it, that's how it looks from here and it just makes me think what went so wrong?

Nikki was really deeply affected by us breaking up and by me being with Vince and just how deeply affected that made him is clear in the treatment of Vince over the last couple of years especially. It was confusing though, when Nikki and Vince were together and I wasn't around they got on better, so much better that you'd hardly realise there was any issue between them but when I was around Nik got so possessive and insecure it made him unreasonable, it made him into an asshole.

I mean, they hosted MTV's 'Headbanger's Ball' together a few months back and when watching that they got on as they almost always had, bantering and talking, laughing. But when Vince was around me, it was like there was a switch flipped inside Nikki's head and he changed entirely into a person that I hardly recognised. A person I honestly didn't like that much because it wasn't Nikki.

Insecurity and jealousy in Nikki were ugly, they made him into someone he didn't want to be. I should have foreseen this behaviour in a way from how he used to be ready to beat men to the brink of death for touching me or sometimes simply talking to me. I shouldn't have foreseen what one of his closest friends having feelings for me would eventually transpire into but I really never thought it would get this bad.

I thought once Vince gave me and Nikki the chance to get back together thing would be better and when we actually did get back together I thought Nik would lose that jealousy but it remained and then when we got engaged and married it got ten times worse. I should have seen it... but I didn't.

I think if Vin would have known Nikki's envy of him would have gotten this bad, I doubt he'd have ever made a move on me to begin with. But what's done is done and these are the consequences of all that.

It was half past two in the afternoon now and we'd had a pretty late start to the day today, Nikki and I had got up at eleven and had only just settled on the couch together because up until this point we'd showered and eaten which left little time for relaxing.