𝗔𝗶𝗻'𝘁 𝗡𝗼 𝗩𝗮𝗹𝗹𝗲𝘆 𝗟𝗼𝘄 𝗘𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 🤍

•𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 209 🥀

•🌹•

Y/N's POV, April 11th 1994

Tonight was the first night of the tour for the self entitled album and now I kinda know how Vince felt when he started his solo shows, it was so different and I couldn't really place right because the guys were laughing and joking, it seemed normal but it felt anything but.

The shows that were actually being played were being kept almost a mystery, well, the amount of people in attendance was being kept secret. I mentioned before some shows had to be canned because I'm guessing not enough tickets were sold for them to go ahead but as for the ticket sales for the shows that were being played, I still didn't know.

Only Nikki, Tommy and Doug knew, Mick, John and me? We had no fucking clue but the fact nobody would tell us the ticket sales I guessed it was pretty poor.

I wasn't quite aware how poor until we got to the venue and people started to fill the arena... actually, fill wasn't the right word, the people kinda slowly dripped in.

It was shocking to me just how few people were actually here, back with Vince the guys could sell out an area this big with ease now? Today, this was probably a twenty thousand seat arena, maybe more and not even half the seats were filled and people standing must have only been just under a thousand. It didn't look like a Mötley Crüe concert and it was almost upsetting to see.

I had been in the dressing room with the other guys up until five minutes ago, that's when I left to come and see the amount of fans out there. The show was starting in a few minutes and I was still in awe at the emptiness of this arena. I couldn't wrap my head around it, the band was in dire straits I knew it but seeing it was another story.

Because the show was due to start any minute now, I wasn't left stood staring out at the sparsely populated arena for long, Nikki's cologne soon hit my nose.

Things with Nikki have been fine since the interview, I'm not sure if he actually listened to what I told him the other day at that interview, well... I knew he listened but I'm not sure if it's sank in yet. He's said nothing more about it so I hope that in the very near future he can start to let go of his jealousy and see Vince the way he used too. Not as a threat but a friend.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Seeing the extent of how much this album has failed." I said simply, looking away from the inside of the arena and towards Nikki "You can't seriously look out there and think that this was successful. You kept the ticket sales from us for a reason, you didn't want to face reality, well, what's out there, or what's not out there, that's your reality."

"It could just be the location, not the band itself."

I rolled my eyes "You know the ticket sales for this whole tour and although I don't, I know that every show is going to be like this. When are you going to admit you were wrong? You used to sell out areas this size no problem five years ago but now? You can't even fill half... doesn't that tell you something?" I said as softly as I could given how frustrated I was standing beside Nikki.

"It says nothing, it proves nothing." Nikki sighed not daring to look at me.

"It proves everything, this doesn't work... you made the wrong choice." I say in retaliation watching Nikki carefully, he glanced at me for a second then looked to the floor, I sigh and knew not to press any further right now, he wasn't ready to hear it yet "Have fun out there." I add after a short silence.