Love In The Lights (Justin Bieber Story)

Chapter 92

YOUR POINT OF VIEW

(2 days later)

So the past two days have been, crazy, manic, and a little bit scary if I am being perfectly honest, ever since I went ice skating with Josh, Jazzy and Jaxon on boxing day, everyone has being going crazy trying to snap pictures of me because they saw the engagement ring and I can’t even walk out of the house without being completely bombarded with people, paparazzi, fans, everyone is asking me the same question ‘is that an engagement ring?’ I don’t know what to say, because obviously it is but I don’t know if I should say that yet, because what if Justin doesn’t want to tell everyone yet and keep it on locks just for the moment, but to be honest I don’t really want to keep it a secret, I’m beyond happy that I’m engaged so I should be able to show it off but people could easily take it the wrong way and assume that I am using Justin. Living this life is so hard sometimes, I forget until some form of drama happens in my life and re-sparks the lights of the camera to be pointed on me and Justin but that’s just the way I live, I can’t change that but then again, I wouldn’t want to change it because if I didn’t accept that modelling contract years ago, I wouldn’t be where I am, I probably wouldn’t be as happy as I am, but most of all I don’t think I would have met Justin, and I wouldn’t be happy, and I wouldn’t be engaged and things would be crazy. Imagine if I wasn’t ‘famous’ would I have ever met Justin, would I be in love with him… but would he be in love with me if I wasn’t famous? Ergh here I go over thinking useless things once again. 

Speaking of Justin, he’s been… a little bit touchy and moody from the few Skype conversations we have had, seems to be something about Scooter, but every single time I went to go and talk to him about it and make him feel better he would instantly say something else to drop the conversation or just cut me short and make up an excuse telling me that he has to go, so I just dropped it, if he wants to tell he, he’ll tell me. He is coming home today and his flight lands soon, but because I am out shopping with my mum I couldn’t go and pick him up, I haven t completely forgiven Justin about leaving on boxing day but I have gotten over it because I cannot be bothered to argue with him over it, knowing that it wasn’t his fault and he can’t help it. Justin’s family goes home in a few days so I just hope that he doesn’t have to disappear again without spending some actual family time with his family but somehow I don’t know if that will work or not because him living his ‘crazy lifestyle’ he could get a call any second of the day saying he has to be on a flight within the next two hours but that’s just what I have to live with.

‘are you looking for anything to buy, or just looking in general?’ my mum asked me scanning through racks of clothes trying to find larger clothes for when her stomach grows more and she cannot fit in her normal clothes anymore, snapping me out of my deep thoughts as she stared at me ‘just looking’ I shrugged shaking my head and sighing ‘you okay sweetie?’ she asked sounding concerned as she walked over and stood next to me ‘yeah I’m fine’ I said followed by another sigh, I don’t really know what was wrong with me, I was just in a bit of a mood for no reason probably because I’m missing Justin but he’s coming home today. ‘You sure?’ she pestered urging me for an answer ‘I’m fine’ I rolled my eyes, playing with the engagement on my hand, swinging it round my wedding finger as I continued to look at the thousands of piles of clothes ‘if you’re having second thoughts about marrying Justin, that’s fine’ she told me rubbing my back comfortingly ‘mum’ I snapped ‘I want to marry Justin!’ I exclaimed taking in a deep breathe to calm myself down as I looked at her, I began to think that maybe she didn’t want me to marry Justin because that’s what the impression I was getting ‘i-I didn’t say you didn’t want to! I-it’s just that you’re both very young’ she muttered ‘you don’t think I know I’m young, I love him mum and I’m not trying to be rude or anything but if you don’t like that we’re getting married, I don’t really care’ I told her bitterly ‘do not be rude young lady’ she warned me, I groaned and rolled my eyes once again, irritated. ‘I’m not being rude, I’m just stating the truth’ I admitted ‘do you want me to state the truth?’ she asked me suddenly having a change in mood and becoming obviously bitchy –this women and her mood swings, I swear- ‘about what?’ I asked feeling out of the loop ‘you and Justin’ she stated ‘er sure, go ahead’ I muttered, not wanting to hear what to has to say ‘I think you’re being absolutely ridiculous getting married, you are too young, marriage shouldn’t even be on your mind! And as soon as you get knocked up he’ll leave you! I don’t think he is good for you, I never have!’ she exclaimed, every word she spoke, my jaw clenched a little tighter, and my hands slowly and gradually began to form fists, I knew I had to do something before I did something I would regret, so I took in one deep breathe and squeezed my eyes shut, snapping them open to see her standing there staring at me with one hand on her hip ‘find your own way home’ I muttered stomping out of the shop, eh I know leaving a pregnant women with no ride home wasn’t the nicest thing to do but right now, I don’t care.

Sprinting away from the –what looked like thousands- of paparazzi I jumped into my car, shielding my eyes from the bright lights, and loads of people surrounding my car, digging around my bag, I pulled out a pair of sunglasses and put them on my face, aware that I look like an idiot wearing sunglasses in December but I do not care. Starting the engine of my car, I began to drive forward hoping to get the paparazzi to move but no; they didn’t budge so I knew the next thing I had to do. I put my foot down on the gas and sped off leaving them trailing behind me, thankful I wasn’t being followed anymore. I heard my phone buzz, so as I pulled up to a red light I pulled it out of my bag and read the text ‘I’m at home now, hurry up, I miss you!:(xxxx’ I smiled and blushed, instantly knowing that the text was from Justin, I didn’t bother replying knowing I would be at home within the next five minutes. Speeding home, I swerved my car into the drive way, practically sprinting to the front door, I quickly twisted my key in the door eager to open the door. I swung the door open seeing Justin stood in the kitchen, as soon as he heard the door open his head snapped towards the front door where I stood smiling at him ‘I didn’t expect you to be home so fast’ he chuckled, jogging over to me and pressing his lips to mine, smiling as we both pulled away ‘I was already on the way home’ I shrugged, dropping my bag and keys on the floor, slipping my shoes off ‘I thought you were shopping with your mum?’ he asked furrowing his eyebrows as he walked back into the kitchen ‘yeah I was, but that didn’t end to well’ I sighed, following him into the kitchen and jumping onto the counter ‘oh why?’ Justin said, turning his attention to me, walking over to me and wiggling his way in between my legs and resting his elbows on my thighs lightly, hesitantly I began to talk ‘she just started going off on one saying how we’re too young to even think about marriage, but the weird thing is she seemed happy about it the other day’ I explained, trying my best not to hurt Justin’s feeling in any way ‘oh’ he muttered looking down ‘and what did you say?’ he asked looking up to me, licking his dry lips in anticipation ‘I told her that I don’t care what she thinks, and I’m still going to marry you’ I smiled down at him, wrapping my arms around his neck ‘good, but I don’t want you to be arguing again’ he murmured ‘I know, neither do I, but she just thinks about herself, she clearly doesn’t see that you make me happy’ I sighed quietly ‘it just seems like everyone is turning against us’ Justin muttered quietly, leaving me confused about who he was talking about ‘who else is ‘turning against us’?’ I asked him quoting his words ‘oh, er, no one’ he stuttered.

‘How was New Jersey?’ I asked him dropping the previous subject and leaning back against the kitchen cabinet, he let a loud, frustrated sigh leave his lips ‘stressful’ he muttered ‘I’m glad to be home and away from Scooter’ he muttered looking away from me ‘why?’ I asked running my slender fingers through his perfectly spiked hair, usually if anyone touched his hair he would slap their hand away, but not me, I got the privilege. ‘just the usual’ he sighed ‘oh okay’ I smiled weak, wanting to know why he was so stressed but I didn’t want to push him further, I didn’t want to cause an unnecessary argument. ‘Do you want to tell people about the engagement?’ I asked him ‘I don’t know yet’ he muttered ‘people are already assuming things, but I don’t know if I want to tell everyone I quiet like keeping it quiet’ I shrugged, although it was lies I just kind of said it… I don’t know to make him feel better? ‘me too’ he said smiling up at me, although I wasn’t convinced about what he was saying, as if he was hiding something from me, shrugging it off I smiled down at him and pressed me lips to his ‘where’s the others?’ I asked him ‘they went out just as I was walking in, I don’t know where though’ he shrugged ‘oh, okay’ I smiled, still wondering of what Justin was telling me, and if he was going to tell me because whatever it was seemed to be bugging him.