Love In The Lights (Justin Bieber Story)

Chapter 83

JUSTIN'S POINT OF VIEW

I woke up before YN, but I decided to stay in bed considering there wasn't anywhere to go and we were still travelling to the next arena. Last night just kept re-playing in my mind; it was just a reminder to me of how badly I screwed up once again. I wasn’t angry at YN anymore, I can never be angry at her, Fredo on the other hand, I’m still annoyed with him, and he flirted with her. End of story. I cannot believe I asked her to marry me, I went with months of planning it and making sure it would just be amazing only for me to tell her everything about it when we were in an argument, my life is fucked up right now... one thought kept playing in mind did she actually want to marry me? Or was I the only one ready to take that next step and get engaged. I'm not saying we have to get married straight away but just being engaged. I feel as if though I always both need and want to be showing her how much I need her to be with me and just how much I love her, I'm constantly wondering about what she is going and if she is okay, I'm scared she will find someone better when I'm on tour, someone who can be with her whenever she needs. I wish I could be with her all of the time but it just doesn't work like that. I hate the thought of YN being back alone in LA when I'm on tour, and every day I have to fight the urge to just jump on a plane and fly straight back to her, then I would be able to care for her, look after her, protect her, give her everything she needs. But I can't. I sighed heavily, running my fingers through my golden brown hair as I kept one arm wrapped around YN's waist urging her body even closer to mine. I stared down at YN with nothing but love filling my eyes, I knew I wanted to marry her, I knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I had no doubt about that, ever since I laid eyes on her months and months ago, I knew there was something special about her, I still remember that day so clearly, when both me and YN won 'teen hottie' and we were asked for a picture, I had only met her moments before that but something about her drew me towards her and it still does to this day. I wrapped my arm tightly around her as if by instinct and pulled her closer to me, and ever since then I've been hooked on her. You could say I'm addicted to her because I constantly need to be with her and need to see her, kiss her, hold her, its uncontrollable. Pressing my lips to her forehead, I allowed them to linger there as she began to stir and roll over so her back was now facing me. I grabbed her waist lightly and pulled her body back to mine so her back was lightly pressed against my bare chest, wrapping my arms tightly around her stomach and kissing her shoulder lightly, caused a light giggle to escape YN's lips 'morning baby' I murmured kissing the top of her spine 'morning' she sighed sweetly placing her hands over mine and wriggling in attempt to escape my grasp 'uh uh uh, where do you think your going?' I whispered in her ear making goose bumps rise to the surface of her skin 'I really need to pee' she said still trying to escape my grasp urgently 'no' I whined and pouted like a five year old not getting their own way 'Justin, if you don't want me to pee on both the bed and your dick, I suggest you let me go' she said in a very serious tone making me immediately release my tight grasp around her as she then flew out of bed and scurried off to the bathroom, wearing nothing but one of my baggy oversized t-shirts, I bit my lip as I just stared at her in pure awe, amazed how anyone could have no flaws. She shut the bathroom door making me snap my thoughts away from her perfect body as I focused on other things. Marriage. Marriage, I was ready to show YN that I was committed to her and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, I'm ready to start a family and be together until death, I'm ready for this and I don't care how young I am or what people say to me or about it, only me and YN know how we feel about each other and if we are ready to move to take the next massive step. But to be perfectly honest I was scared to actually ask her, what if she says no, what if she rejects me? I'll make myself look like a fool in front of her, and then what if she thinks I'm moving too fast? And then she leaves me. Oh gosh, this always happens, I over think everything and stress myself out, b-but I just can't help it, but you never know until you try. I'm going to do it, I'm going to propose, I have to, and I need to do it soon, and I have the perfect place to do it.