Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 101: Our Girls Are Home Part 1

The week Nikki and I spent together, that was given was very much needed. We took time for the US, and we loved and missed our children dearly as they were always, always on our minds. Poor Nikki, had it rough.... his emotions and all as he wailed were all over the place, staying tired all the time and the nausea spells and the dizziness, which sadly the Doctor told us was normal and it's that, that leads into our oldest girl's homecoming. Luckily their homecoming was on a Friday and Mars ended up dropping them off with Brad after Josephine got out of school and THAT brings us back to Nikki. Nikki always breaks my heart to see him cry, cause honestly it makes me cry but I digress. This day of Josephine and Amara coming home was fucking rough. Poor Nikki didn't speak a word and he sadly ended up having a bout of morning sickness, which frankly scared me but I kept it together for Nikki's sake and to be safe I took him to the hospital and turned out the triplets: Tony, James and Frankie were fine but Nikki was placed on the dreaded strict bed rest which we were also told DIDN'T apply to the bedroom, which I could tell from Nikki's Eyes it relieved him and where you will find us is Josephine and Amara have just been dropped off and Nikki who'd insisted on being downstairs was sleeping....

I thanked Mick profusely, he told me that we were family and it's the least he could do, taking the girls with Brad but he has just dropped them off and now, now I am hugging them both tightly to me, loving having them back home and, I am very much worried about Nikki....

"I've missed the both of you so much, so much."

"We missed you too daddy and mommy...." Josephine trails off tears in her eyes, that I notice as I look down into hers, "---Is....is mommy, ok?"

"Unka Mickey Tay' (say) Mommy hospital." Amara's little lips tremble, she is trying so hard not to cry.

"Oh, my little bees...." I start trying to keep it together for my oldest daughters before sighing heavily, "---Its true, I took him just to make sure things were ok and they are, your brothers and sisters are doing well. I took him because he had a bout of morning sickness, so I've worried about that, and mommies had a rough day today. He hasn't said a word at all, and too he's on strict bed rest." I manage to get out, hating to worry them MORE but believing I need to be honest with my children.

"Can cheer Pease?" Amara begs.

"Daddy, I help too." Josephine declares, whispering.

"Yeah, yeah you can. He's gonna be so happy to see you two, right now mommy is finally sleeping....so let's, let mommy rest and we can do something special for...." I trail off, getting this feeling.... specially since I hear whimpering noises and NOT from my upset little girls.... i race into the living room, Amara and Josephine in tow to find Nikki crying in his sleep and he seems so scared....

Quickly I instruct Josephine and Amara to stay close, as I calm them for, I realize Nikki is VERY quickly heading into a bad nightmare or is in one and that is NOT good....

"Honeybee, shhh......Nikki.... I'm here, ok? The girls are home, come on babe I need you to calm...." I take Nikki in my arms as best I can, him starting to thrash in my arms, "Nikki, WAKE UP.... It's Joe. I know, know it HURTS, I know you are scared, tired and overwhelmed. I NEED you to know I'm scared too, I can't lie to you Nikki, I'm worried and still, still I am HERE. I ain't going anywhere, I love you babe, I love you...talk to me, talk to me babe...." I whisper, placing a hand on his swollen stomach the triplets, I can NOW feel are starting to calm and gently I rub my Honeybees stomach.

Nikki calms thankfully, and he opens his eyes.... still in tears and he looks terrified.

"J-Joe?"

"It's me, it's me.... you're doing so well, ok? Just breathe babe." Nikki listens to me, closing his eyes, burying his face as best he can in my chest. At last, he is calmed enough to speak, and I feel our daughters close to us....

"Joe? J-Joe.... I'm sorry....and...." Here Nikki looks and realizes Amara and Josephine are with us and the expression of guilt and pain become evident on his face. Breaking my heart, "Girls...Mommy is so sorry that I...."

Josephine cuts him off, "Mommy stop.... Daddy says no can help and you like me, it scary and all in your head. You are not alone mommy." Josephine gently reminds him albeit tearfully. "T-Talk even if hurt, p-please." She adds on begging, which I can tell breaks Nikki's heart, cause I know it breaks mine and I see the realization that he KNOWS she's right.

"Ok...OK...." Nikki sighs before looking at us all and realizing Josephine and Amara have managed to cuddle against Nikki's unoccupied side, like me doing what they can to help make him feel better, which god does that touch the heart. "I-I, am scared, too much in my head.... Today, has been a nightmare. I got sick, and I haven't talked till now....my hormones are everywhere, Doctor's placed me on strict bedrest, and I hate that. I know WHY I need it, but still...." Nikki pauses hesitating but still says, "My nightmare....it was BAD, Joe.... i dreamed, was dreaming I didn't m-make it with the triplets come, I don't wanna leave you.... leave our family. It felt so REAL though." A heavy silence other than the occasional sounds of sobs descends and I freeze for a moment....

Oh GOD.... Oh NIKKI.... Nikki....

I find my voice and gently caress his face with my hands, telling him, "—Honeybee, LISTEN.... I know it's scary, and God hearing that.... scares me. I hurt because you my love hurt but I am here to tell ya, I will do ANYTHING to keep you safe. I wont let that happen....and remember, I would save you repeatedly, always. You won't leave us, I promise.... I know it felt real, I know babe. But I gotcha, I gotcha.... ALL of us do. All you need to do is concentrate on our babies inside you, on our children. I love you; I love you and I AM HERE."

I have to tell you that sadly, his nightmare would come true.... i wont go into any more details other than to say, obviously he DID end up alive, thereby making it and would be ok. Tony, James and Frankie too would be ok, their birth though haunts Nikki and I to this day, but we got thru it or rather we will....

Nikki and I kiss like we haven't kissed in YEARS, I give the babies housed with in him affection and together Nikki and I give our oldest affection, lots of 'kissies', hugs and those precious giggles......after a point, I help Nikki to the bathroom, Josephine and Amara trailing behind before using the potty themselves, I get Nikki settled and less sore on our couch again....fetch Nikki's cravings and the girls want their snacks and so we all end up gathered in the living room, TOGETHER....TOGETHER......ALWAYS.

I catch Nikki's gaze, and he smiles, SMILES as I know he is thinking the same as I and he takes my breath away and the scene before me, MY family does the same, hitting me hard in the BEST of ways....

A/N: Poor Nikki, and with that nightmare.... I can promise you; things will turn out ok. And the Perry family is together again, Amara and Josephine are back with their parents and the next chapter will be part 2 to this. Stay tuned.