Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 97: My Worlds (part 1)

This past month since the tour has ended, has been busy.... but the best kind of busy. For instance, taking Josephine to school which I'd very much missed when I was away and picking her up too. And then taking care of her, of Amara and of course my beloved Honeybee Nikki and our unborn sons and youngest daughter. Truly there is nothing I love more than caring for my family, I do what I do BECAUSE they are my world, and I love them dearly. Nikki, my poor Nikki still struggling so with his hormones as he cries about, and mentally at times, and he struggles with nausea and dizziness still though the Doctor has assured us that the triplets are OK, which relieves me greatly but still. And our family at large has for the past month called for Nikki and I to have time for ourselves arguing and I hate admitting they are right, that we really needed it and that is both a special and difficult time and that really, we've been neglecting ourselves.... which brings us to now....

I am desperately trying to comfort my crying husband, who is clinging to me as best he can while sobbing into my chest and the reason is Mick and Brad have taken Josephine and Amara for a bit or they did earlier so Nikki and I can have time for ourselves. I protested A hell of a LOT; Nikki wasn't happy either...isn't right now.

"N-Nikki, I know......Oh honeybee, I didn't want them to go.... i want them to be HERE with us, but baby right now, you gotta try and calm down, this isn't good for you, our babies." Nikki refuses to budge......until I gently caress his face with one hand and with another hand rest it on his beautiful and I mean beautiful swollen stomach, "---Much as I hate it, they were right. We've been neglecting ourselves Nikki, we are no good to our children if we don't take time for us. I love you all, MY family, the family I never thought I would have more than words can ever express. I do what I do, BECAUSE I love you and our children so much. If I regret ANYTHING it's not being there for you sooner like when we met. Now, if you really want to, I will get our children back but remember this: there is no one I would rather have at my side than YOU AND NO ONE better to be the mother of my children."

Nikki is MUCH calmer after my words and finally he finds his voice, "Joe....Ok. I trust you and you, you're right. I love you so much, couldn't do this without you."

"I love you too and ditto on that." I reply before leaning in to capture his sweet lips, parting with a contented sigh. "—Now, let's see about getting you resting and were you craving anything?"

Nikki taps a finger against his chin in thought, "Those figs we had and some ham....and I..." Nikki freezes but then smiles and I know WHY because I feel exactly what he does, our sons and youngest daughter are now kicking, "---I think they are excited about those figs and the ham!" He laughs and I laugh with him, loving seeing him happy.

I gently rub his swollen stomach, reveling in this moment....

"I think they are too!" I agree then adding on tenderly, my gaze meeting Nikki's, "---Though I believe that they feel how very much they are loved and God.... you look so damn beautiful right now." Nikki's eyes fairly glow.

I do end up getting him more settled, and make sure he's as comfortable as I can be before fetching his cravings, which he eats quickly but then right after he looks so sleepy managing to murmur, "Wanna sleep in bed...." So very carefully I carry him being mindful of our triplets and soon have him settled in our bed and then I can't resist and I place my hands on his swollen stomach, and still I can feel the babies with in move, and it's a testament to how tired Nikki is, that he doesn't stir given he fell asleep the instant his head hit the pillow...so I gently start rubbing his stomach, whispering to our three youngest, keeping them calm...

"Hey in there, its daddy. I just wanted to tell you three how much I love you, and how lucky am I? That mommy gave me three more little angels. Ya know, you three have two older sisters and they are so excited to meet you. I just love feeling you three move and kick, it's magical. Just like it was with your sisters and you don't know how many times I dreamed of moments like this when mommy and I were sadly apart, I nearly lost him but I LEARNED what it meant, what it means to love and really in the end BE loved.....Now, my precious sons and my precious little girl, you need to sleep....you need lots of sleep, but if you three or mommy need me, I am right here.....One more thing: I am proud to be your father, to you three and your older sisters, there is NOTHING I love more than being a father, it's a dream come true." By the end of my speech to my unborn sons and daughter, I can feel they have calmed, and I gather that they are now asleep, and I look up to see Nikki....

I see Nikki's angular, sharp features soft.... He looks peaceful and he takes my breath away and the tears I gathered talking to our triplets are now coming in full force.

Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating....... the sweetest dream, would NEVER do cause I'd still miss you baby, and I don't wanna miss a thing....

"I love you Nikki, I love you babe." I whisper. Gradually, I strip down to my boxers and gather a book, joining my husband in bed. It's not that late, just before what would be our oldest girl's bedtime...Nikki stirs but only to burrow into me as best he can make my heart melt, and I get this feeling.... the phone starts to ring, thankfully not disturbing Nikki and two of the sweetest voices in the world come thru: Josephine and Amara...... Josephine had called earlier in the day, after school and after she finished her schoolwork. Amara also joining in, God I missed the two of them and I loved hearing about their day. Everything to what was learned, Josephine telling me Mick and Brad let her practice with their guitars, and she told me it was like Christmas.... Amara told me she wanted to go to school with her sister and of course both girls missed Nikki and I, but they UNDERSTOOD that their mother and I needed time.

"Night-night daddy!" The voice of my little twin Amara.

"Night daddy. Oh! Give mommy lots of love and kisses and tell him we miss him and our brothers and sisters and too rest lots and lots." Josephine says excited and too I hear the concern laced in there for Nikki.

"Night girls, I love you both so much. And Josephine? I will tell him, I promise, and mommy is sleeping now, and I promise you that he will be ok and that I am too."

"I know you right daddy, but Mara' and I worry cause mommy still feel sick lots." Josephine says.

"I know you two do, I do too.... Every pregnancy is different, the doctor told us, and it can make mommy feel bad a lot more. He's carrying three babies and its hard on him, yes but he will be ok and though it feels like it he won't feel bad forever. Mommy is doing so much better than he was, now Josephine...Amara you two get some sleep, and if you need me, I will come running."

"Ok Daddy." They chorus together, followed by 'love you' and soon they hang up AFTER having given Nikki love and kisses thru the phone.

I remember that October night very well, and it just so happened that it was October 9, 1994, and not only that it was the only the first night of the time that Nikki and I spent together as Mick and Brad had picked up my oldest children earlier that morning. Now, as we continue our tale for this next part, I will let my beloved Honeybee take the reins.

A/N: Tender moments, emotional.... you name it. Next, we hear from Nikki as he and Joe continue to spend time together, so more to come soon!