Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 86: Worries, Love & Suprises

Things have been busy no doubt for the past several months: projects related to my husband's band, spending time with our children, projects related to my band and now, now Aerosmith is two weeks into a world tour. God, I really fucking miss Nikki and our daughters! Speaking of our daughters, Josephine now fully recovered from her ordeal at the hands of that evil Bitch Deana and God am I proud of my oldest little girl. Josephine still has her days, but she is doing WAY better mentally. Amara, my precious twin saves for the eyes and lips.... She continues to grow and, in a few months, will be two, two! I wish to God things would slow down, but I wouldn't trade my family for anything in this world. Still, it's so damn hard being without them on the road, it has been. True, I guess we have a break since we all have young children in, I think 2 weeks or so.... but regardless Nikki is supposed to be joining us, I have dearly, and I do dearly miss my other half...and speaking of....

I am startled out of my reverie by Joey, who quickly apologizes....

"Sorry man, you're awfully deep in thought. You really miss Nikki and your kids I can tell. And I know it sucks cause we're all in the same fuckin' boat."

I sigh heavily, "Yeah, yeah it does fucking suck." I find myself frowning, my worries bubbling to the surface, "Hey.... I've been really worried about Nikki; I've tried to call the house, and I get scared when he doesn't answer. I can't get him and when I do, he's so...sounds scared and he doesn't wanna worry me he says and sometimes its sounded like he's been getting sick.... and...." I trail off as it hits me like a thunderbolt, and now everyone has their attention on me. At that exact moment it hit me, reminding me of what it was like for Nikki with Josephine and Amara, but something felt different.... well, you know already, but anyway. I should also mention at this point in our tale this conversation took place roughly an hour or so prior to our show that night, it was more like two hours. "---I wonder, I haven't thought about it sooner but.... I get this feeling he's pregnant. But if I am right and my gut tells me I am, something feels DIFFERENT."

"Yeah man.... he usually calls, everyone else did...." Steven's brows furrow in concern but before he can possibly get any more words out, our manager looks worried, telling me I have a phone call and I immediately run to the phone, trying to keep it together as much as possible. Allow me to interject a moment, we'd after all that bullshit with our management circa 87' to 88' ended up getting new management. Elektra had fought us at first, but wisely they backed down, anyway on with the show.... I answer the phone breathlessly, worried out of my mind, hoping Nikki and our possible baby is ok and my girls, oh god.... BREATHE JOE. "---Hello?"

"J-Joe.... Joe...." My heart soars and drops both at hearing his voice, MY Nikki's voice.

"Breathe Nikki, come on you gotta breathe honeybee." I plead with him, barely managing to hold back my tears, "I promise you no lie, whatever it is....it will be ok."

"S-Scared..." He whimpers.

"Hey. Hey, I know you are.... I am too, for you. Tell me baby what's wrong?" I urge.

A Shaky breathe, "Girls.... girls are o-ok......i-I didn't mean to scare them.... Tommy and Popcorn (Steven Adler-Lee) have them. I...I am at the hospital..." He pauses a moment, "I-I.... just really wanted to.... i mean you're on tour, probably fixing to go on stage...and I..."

I interrupt a moment, "that don't fucking matter, you matter more Nikki.... You and our children come FIRST. I love you baby, please tell me...."

"Ok...Ok." Nikki exhales shakily, "I've been sick, I thought at first, I could handle it...didn't last long, I know my limits, or I should say was reminded. Its...it's been bad, I wanted to tell you in person.... but I am pregnant." He cries.

Vaguely I am aware of Tom, Joey and Steven are with me now, lending me the support which I very much need and am SO grateful for.

"Nikki, that's AMAZING.... we're.... really having another baby?"

A long pause ensues before Nikki at last speaks again, "Well the thing is.... they um, found something.... Joe, there's more than o-one. I'm carrying triplets." I feel my eyes widen, shocked.... worried but thrilled to be having more children and I love my husband even more so. "I mean, I need you.... i feel like shit.... but...I mean." Nikki fumbles.

"Honeybee, listen to me. This is a huge shock and for you even more so. I hate that you're so scared and ill, but I love the triplets so much already and you, I love you even more." I think for a moment, sharing a look with the guys and I mouth 'pregnant' and 'triplets' their eyes widen collectively with shock, and I hear mutters of 'holy shit' before I resume talking to Nikki determined to tell him, "Nikki? I'm coming home...now, you need me baby....and I.... gonna cancel the tour and take care of you and the girls...."

Nikki interrupts me, "NO! Joe, like I said.... I am scared, I feel like shit and baby yes, I need you. But I realize once again my limits, I found them and one thing I know more than any other, is you love me no matter what and you always take care of me even if it's from afar. I want you to do what you love Joe, yes, I know I and ALL our children mean more to you, but I know you will make me proud.... you always have even when I was to blind to see. And besides, you'll be home in another 2 weeks for a 2-week break, and I know we can do.... ugh...gotta.... gotta go!" The line goes dead but not before I hear him start retching.

I am torn.... I would do anything Nikki asks me.... but I've been so worried about him, and I've heard pregnancies with multiples that well they can be high risk. I think too, the tour should be cancelled....it SHOULD. Yet I also know that Nikki is right......

I break down....and more time has passed then I realize as we're told we have now 20 minutes till showtime....

"So, it's true?" Tom speaks up.

"Yeah....triplets....he's....he got sick.....and he's so scared....he told me he wants me to do THIS...the tour, and I am torn....i want to honor his wishes but....then I feel it's more important that I be there for him....so I think we need to cancel the dates and reschedule....and I...there's th-the break.." I ramble.

"Perry listens, if I know ANYTHING about him is that he means what he says." Steven sighs brows furrowed with concern, "---I don't fucking blame you, but he's not alone.... neither are you in this. You can do this, you both can. Whatever you decide man we're right behind you."

I came close, WE did to canceling the tour entirely that's true.... We did go on stage that night, albeit delayed and there was another phone call from Nikki when I got off stage. I told him that I was going to cancel the tour, that Aerosmith would, and he again told me and reminded me, "Jo-Jo Bear.... I love you; I love you so much. I believe in you, and US. We can get through this, and I know that you will not only find your way back to me but always take care of me no matter what or where you are. You'll have breaks throughout the tour, and I think we'd both feel guilty if you quit now. Remember, I am always with you, our hearts entwined. Soon, soon I will see you in person...tell you in person but until then I will see you in my dreams."

So, we would ultimately keep the tour going, which was due to end around September, and THANKFULLY before Amara's 2nd birthday and of course we'd have the breaks throughout. I did take care of him on the road and when I got home, was home and in fact where you will next find me is at my home sweet home, reunited with Nikki and all FIVE of our children......in the hospital again since his morning sickness wouldn't let up....and one last thing, if you're wondering yes, the triplets were and would be ok......

A/N: Here we go, officially 1994 and Nikki and Joe are expanding their family with the triplets! Next, we shall see them and their children reunited.