Might as Well Face it, You're Addicted to Love (Joe Perry/Nikki Sixx)

Chapter 78: My Heart is An Open Book Part 4

God, I remember every moment of that day of December 21, 1993, a mere few days from Christmas. My family, my loves...all of us TOGETHER. And I especially remember that Josephine smiled, SMILED for the first time in what felt like forever and moreover she was finally beginning to heal. Her smile is MY smile.... magical to me and according to Nikki. Josephine still would have her moments, only natural as would we all, but she wasn't alone...NONE of us were. The greatest gift, or gifts I should say Christmas of 93 was having my oldest daughter back, her smiling.... laughing, our family whole and our bonds only ever growing. And we will join my family, aka the Perry Family in the kitchen.... the girls settled and you will see....

Amara has just been placed in her little highchair, excited and happy as can be. Josephine though, looks as if she could cry as Nikki and I pause in gathering things to make my special lasagna.

"Josephine? Honey what's wrong?" I ask Cautiously, worried...Amara too is getting worried especially once Josephine bursts into tears and Nikki and I rush to her side, hugging her...Amara too helping in her own special little way. "---Honey, I promise whatever it is, it will be ok.... I....".

"D-Daddy.... I missed us.... i missed this.... I didn't think I would see home again; I love the kitchen and it...it hurts." Josephine mumbles as we try and soothe her and wipe away her tears.

"Oh, sweet bee, sweet bee.... mommy and I have too.... missed this, all of us together. Food especially brings us together. And we weren't gonna stop till you were back home...." I croak, "---No matter where I am, I will always find my way to you and I know it hurts, God do I know but the important thing is, YOU are here.... our family is together, and we all love you so much."

"I love you all too daddy." More hugs are given, tears are dried and Nikki and I sharing a kiss, we resume fixing dinner. Amara meanwhile having her own precious little conversation with her older sister....

"Fee Betta?"

"I do sissy, we have the bestest, strongest parents ever!" Josephine answers her, and God speaking of her answer, it brings tears to my eyes once more and I know Nikki is much the same way. I never imagined I'd EVER be a father, nor did I imagine when I became one that I'd be a good father. It's hard to believe there was a time where I at least felt that was very much true. But I love being a father to my two girls, so much and there is no one I'd rather have at my side than Nikki who is an amazing mother to our girls...but the point is I'd rather have no one at my side but him raising our children.... together.

Nikki and I manage to trade kisses, watch over our girls.... potty breaks happen, delicious aromas permeate the air but the most amazing thing of all, is I am HERE with my family......

Before I know it, the lasagna is fixed along with garlic bread and a cucumber salad drizzled with balsamic. I insist on Nikki getting settled with our daughters, while I dish up portions for everyone and at last join my family, as we begin to eat (Amara being helped of course) and we talk....

"Tasty dada!" Amara declares, little smile my Nikki's smile on full display.

I chuckle, "Glad you think so little bee. Thank you."

"Mommy says it's the love that makes it taste so good daddy." Josephine word's get me misty, so worth it.... more than.

"He's not wrong, you girls wanna know a secret?" I ask my daughter's, both nodding, "Like with what I do, playing with Aerosmith, writing songs, and ESPECIALLY you two, and your mommy.... i put my heart and soul into it, my love.... the most love goes for you and mommy, our family. You are all my worlds."

"Jo-Jo Bear..." The way Nikki says my nickname, says it ALL to me. We kissed, and then resumed eating and talking, my heart so full and so light.

"Mommy? I curious, why do you call daddy 'Jo-Jo Bear' all the time?" Josephine asks and I feel Nikki squeeze my hand, smiling albeit tearfully.

"Well, I started calling him that before you and your sister was born.... see, it all goes back to the story I told you....it was just after I'd gotten out of the hospital after my overdose. I was still working on my issues, and felt I wasn't ready just to share a bed with your daddy, but one night.... I'd had a bad nightmare and so, I NEEDED him, I missed just lying in his arms and he made me feel better and from the heart I told him I needed my Jo-Jo Bear. I'd NEVER had anyone that I loved or gave a nick name too, it was huge for me and for the US. And since I called him that, that is why he calls me his 'honeybee'.... I'd again never been called such a loving name before and what I loved and do even more is its HIM that calls me that."

"You are my other half Nikki, I love you." I whisper.

"You are my other half, my heart and soul Joe. I love you too." Nikki whispers back, meanwhile our daughters look to us in awe, and I know they see and feel the love between Nikki and I....

Eventually we finished dinner, me so relieved and glad to see Josephine eating. My heart breaks because she hadn't been eating much since her kidnapping. The girls both made a huge mess, and this led to the inevitable baths. Nikki offers to get the girls their baths, I insist more we will do it together. As quickly as I can, I clean the kitchen, store leftovers and join my family upstairs. I enter our bedroom to find Nikki has Amara and Josephine's favorite Christmas themed night gowns laid out, their towels and has them both wrapped in adorable 'kid sized' bathrobes. I stand a moment in our bedroom doorway to admire the scene before me....

Nikki is a natural, a beyond amazing mother and partner.... Truly I love him more with each breath I take and our daughters? The way they look up to us, the way they love us.... I love them more than I can ever, ever express. Looking at them now, Nikki's green eyes glowing, smile playing upon his lips.... Josephine and Amara both hugging Nikki, its.... This is everything to me.

I sigh with contentment, beyond happy to have my precious family together.

I clear my throat softly and three sets of the most beautiful eyes turn towards me....

"Hey, I'm here."

Excited shouts of 'daddy' and soon Nikki is before me, our girls in tow, I caress his face tenderly before claiming his lips and then giving my daughters kisses on their foreheads.

"Let's get the girls cleaned and then I believe some cocoa, cookies and a Disney movie are in order." Nikki grins.

"Sounds perfect Honeybee, absolutely perfect." I grin back.

We did indeed do as Nikki said and roughly two days would pass which brings us to December 23, 1993, or as Josephine said one of her 'bad days.' She was so quiet that day, I remember well clinging to Nikki and I and of course he and I did whatever we could to be there for her, to love her through it. And in those wee hours of said date......i would come to find my oldest downstairs in our studio playing one of her favorite guitars of mine from my collection for she'd had a bad nightmare she said and couldn't sleep. And next time, that is where we will pick up here in our tale....

A/N: Part 4 now done, next is the chapter where we will find Joe and his oldest daughter in the studio and well you will see. Josephine will continue to do some much needed healing.