Author: PinkPreppyPerfect
Plot:
Star football player killed a popular chick, someone saw it, she's keeping the secret and telling the story. Ehh, it's been done before, and often enough that it comes to a point where it gets to be a little much. There is a cliche feel to it as well that doesn't really make me that interested. However, that does go in hand with some things that I mention below as well.
But as a general rule I find plots like this to be boring just because I've seen and read so many of them, and yours doesn't seem to be very different.
3/5
Grammar:
You don't have a lot of grammatical errors, but you have enough that it's a irritating. Most of them are small things that should be found easily and gotten rid of.
3/5
Descriptions:
There really weren't any in the prologue or chapter one. Probably because they both read like summary's more or less, so then you don't feel the need to throw in description. Which is fine, but, description is really important. I don't know if there is any in your chapter two because I'm not reading that, but I hope there is.
2/5
Characters:
I have to say the same thing here that I have to say for the plot. She comes across as a character that I see a lot in teen fiction, or just teen novels. She's the once nerdy girl who got "saved" by a popular girl and ended up with a football player. And that is really all that defines her. Her personality comes across as very dry and there isn't much life in her character. It's just meh.
3/5
What I Hated:
The "prologue" that is an extension of the summary. If you feel the burning desire to leave it there, I suggest changing it to Extended Summary, instead of prologue. I did see quite a few grammatical errors in it, but, I'm not going to mention them and just move on to Chapter 1.
AHHHHH! You keep using parts that were in the "prologue" and the actual summary for your book. I feel like saying everything three times the same way is a little too much. Especially in your first chapter.
Cliche...there are so many in that first chapter. AHHH!
This first chapter doesn't read like a story at all, it sounds like another summary, especially because you re-cap what happened again. It ends up being super choppy and not being long and well thought out or descriptive, it's just another thing that happens.
You should re-title the chapters to: Summary, Prologue, Chapter One. Or an even better thing you could get rid of the summary portion all together, it's not needed and just becomes extra annoying when you read the same thing three times in a row. But anyways, this set up with the titles will work a lot better for you, and make so much more sense.
1/5
Overall:
This book isn't bad, it just needs a lot of work. And to get everything with the chapters figured out and titled in a way that makes sense.
Final Score:
12/25
