Author: JohnPaul191
Plot or Cover/Blurb:
The cover is kind of gross. I'm not a fan of the whole two faces merging in the middle or whatever the background is??? I think it might be a throne? Either way this works on novels that have been published and you have the book in your hand, but it looks really bad on wattpad. It isn't crisp and is a little pixely and blurry in some spots. Granted it is not the worst that I have ever seen and is probably fine for most people. I do suggest considering changing it at some point.
The blurb is fine. However, you are giving me a lot of vibes and pieces that you find in so many different fantasy books. A lot of the components are the same. Which the separated at birth, and one being poor while the other having a life of luxury is really common. And then so is the "one will be dark and the other light" that is all over the place. Then of course you have the inevitable meeting between the two which obviously won't go well. I guess what I'm trying to say is that from the blurb this sounds like it has the potential to be very cliche.
2/5
Grammar:
You have decent grammar, I didn't really notice too many mistakes, just a few simple ones here and there.
3/5
Descriptions:
You described a ton of things, they might not be super whimsical or pretty descriptions but they were practical and really did help set the scene and ground the reader. However, I do want ones that have better flow and are more pleasant to read.
3/5
Characters:
I didn't read enough for this section. So I am going to keep it out of the review.
What I Hated/Thoughts:
"A loud sound of the drums" That sounds really weird, it isn't a sound if you establish what it is, it is THE sound of the drums. And then after that it isn't the drums either, you get rid of that and make it just drums. Giving you: "The loud sound of drums..."
You switch tenses a couple times, be careful with that.
I'm honestly just bored. I love that you're setting the scene and trying to build the world, but it is too much. There is nothing to catch my interest or make me want to read more. This honestly reads a little bit like one of those documentaries that you watch in history class.
You need to watch the flow of your sentences there are a lot of them that are really awkward and not pleasant to read.
*takes a week long break*
I'm sorry, I really can't do this right now. I have too many thing many things in my head right now and this is just too boring for me to properly focus on and continue reading.
3/5
Overall:
This book is seriously just not for me. The writing isn't terrible, and it isn't exactly a bad book, I just think it's really boring.
Final Score:
11/20
