I'm Yours (Sequel to "You're mine")

Chapter 43: Feeling empty

- 1 year later -

Talia's POV

We had been doing well. Day after day, things were fine.

Leah was still in college. She had been struggling with some classes. She felt really bad about it, but I tried reassuring her to take it slow. Not everyone has the same pace in life.
Her disease was also fine. We were dealing with it day by day. Some days were really bad and she just had to stay at home and rest. Such days were rare but they happened...

I was still teaching math. I loved it. It was my dream job. I hope one day Leah can be a teacher too. I know she'll do well.

Even though I was doing what I loved every day. I didn't feel completely happy. I tried focussing on the good things in my life. I have a house, I have a wonderful wife, and an amazing job. Things are fine... But they're not perfect yet.

Lately, it felt like there was an empty spot in my heart, in my life. I'm missing something. I don't feel whole. It's such a horrible feeling. Especially because I know what it is I'm missing...

I was packing my bag. The school day had just ended. I sighed as I looked outside.

"Well, that's a big sigh..."

I looked at the door and saw Charlotte. "Hey," I closed my bag and walked to her. "I was just thinking about dinner."

She raised her eyebrows. "Dinner?"

I nodded. "I have to go to the grocery store first before going home..." I sighed again. "I don't feel like doing that..."

"Then don't do it."

I chuckled. "I have to," We walked out of my classroom, I then locked the door. "Leah needs to eat well."

Charlotte nodded but I could tell she wanted to ask more about it. My friends didn't know the full extent of Leah's health problem. In fact, only our parents and her friends knew about it. It was Leah's choice not to inform too many people. I respected her choice.

We walked to the exit of the school together. Our cars were parked in front of the building, the parking lot reserved for the teachers. "Have a good evening." I said before getting in my car.

"You too." She said before getting in her car.

I drove to the grocery store. While I was going there, I went over the things I'd need. I had a list in my mind, I hoped I'd remember it when I'm in the store...

I got to the store, parked my car, and quickly got inside. I went over every aisle. I always did that, sometimes I'd see things I didn't think of. I knew Leah loved to cook meals, so when I saw something new, I got it for her.

I admit, when we got the diagnose for her disease and everything that would change for her food, it was a lot. Ordinary things like milk, yoghurt, cheese, butter... Those are things I don't buy anymore, because Leah gets really sick of them. She once told me I could still eat it but I refused. I just didn't want to risk it.
Instead, I'd look at alternatives. At first, I had my doubts, but they're actually not that bad.

When I got everything, I went to the check-out. There was a bit of a queue. I was waiting and looking at the time tick by. I wasn't really in a rush to get home, Leah had classes till 6 pm. She wouldn't be home for another 2 hours...

When I could finally load my items onto the conveyor belt, I hurried. I was done with waiting in line.

I had loaded everything on it and now waited for the people in front of me to leave. I looked up and saw it was a woman with a baby. The baby was looking at me while the woman was loading her groceries into the shopping cart.

I looked at the baby and smiled.

The baby kept looking at me.

I waved at the baby and pulled a funny face.

The baby started laughing and that sound went through my heart and soul.

Before I could do anything else, the woman had paid and left with her baby. I watched them a bit until I heard a voice call out to me: "Ma'am?"

I blinked and turned towards the man at the check-out. "Uhm, yes, sorry?"

He looked at me funny, probably wondering why I was staring at a random person like that. "I said, that's it?"

"Yes," I took my card and paid for the groceries. I then loaded them into my shopping cart before looking at the man again. "Thanks, have a good evening."

I walked back to the car and loaded the groceries into the car. I closed the trunk and sighed.

I drove back home. I unloaded all the groceries and sighed again. I walked to the kitchen and took the equiment I needed. I took the food I needed and sighed again.

About an hour later, Leah arrived home. "Hey baby," She walked to me. She kissed my lips before looking at the plates I was serving. "That looks delicious."

I smiled at her. "Have a seat," I said while we sat down. "You must be hungry."

"I am," She nodded before looking at me. "Thanks for this."

I smiled a bit.

She started eating. "Mmm, baby," She nodded. "This is great," She then looked at me. "Aren't you going to eat?"

I blinked a bit. "Uhm yes," I started eating too then. "I was just thinking about today."

She looked at me. "Rough day?"

I sighed. "Kind of."

She kept looking at me, eventually she put her fork and knife down. "Baby," She paused. "What's wrong?"

I sighed and put my fork and knife down too. "It's nothing..."

She raised her eyebrows. "It's clearly something that's been bothering you for a while," She said, gaining my attention. "So whatever it is, it's not nothing."

I looked down. "I've been thinking..." I gulped. "But I kept quiet about it because I don't want to ruin what we have," I looked at her and saw she was frowning. She was clearly wondering what was going on. I sighed deeply. "I've been feeling empty."

Her face dropped when I said that. "You're feeling depressed again?" She asked, immediately reaching for my hands. She was clearly worried about me.

I gulped. "Not quite," I looked at her. "It feels like I'm missing something," I sighed. "I went to the grocery store after school," I said, getting a nod from her. "I was queuing at the check-out," I looked down again, thinking about my magical encounter. "The woman in front of me had a baby," I paused. "I made it laugh," I looked back up at her. "It was wonderful."

Leah didn't really say anything, but I had an idea what she was thinking. Unlike before, she seemed to just listen to me instead of shutting down the idea.

I gulped and kept looking at her. "Leah, I..." I paused, I was so nervous to say the sentence out loud. I gulped again. "I want to have a child."