I'm Yours (Sequel to "You're mine")

Chapter 44: One tiny step at a time

Leah's POV

"Leah, I..." She paused, She seemed nervous. "I want to have a child."

A million thoughts were running through my mind. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her. I wanted to say so much but, at the same time, I didn't want to upset her too much.

"Leah?" She gulped. "Please," She paused. "Say something."

I looked down a bit, thinking about my response. I looked up at her. "Do you think you're ready to get pregnant again?"

She gulped but nodded. "It's my biggest desire," She smiled a bit. "It's my biggest wish."

I slowly nodded.

She sighed. "I feel that I'm missing something, I want to have a child with you," She looked down. "But I understand if you're not ready for that yet. We agreed to wait until after you're done with college..."

I looked away. I understood where this was coming from. We would indeed wait until after college but since I needed more time than we thought...

"It's nothing," She suddenly said. "Forget I said anything." She pulled her hands back and continued eating her dinner.

I watched her. She was eating dinner, she seemingly had ended the conversation. But I knew better. "T," I said, making her stop eating immediately. "If you feel empty, I want to help you fill that hole."

She looked down.

I gulped, I can't believe I'm saying this... "Since the last time you got pregnant, I got a lot of thinking done," I said, gaining a nod from her. "I think that if we were to get pregnant, we would manage."

T nodded but didn't look up at me.

I looked away briefly. "I know there's no one else I'd want to have children with," I looked at her again and saw she was looking at me. She seemingly knew what I was going to say. "If you're ready to get pregnant, I'm on board."

Her face lit up immediately. "R-really?"

I smiled then. "Yes," I looked at her while she stood up. "I'm on board." I repeated and got up too.

T wrapped her arms around me, she hugged me tightly. She held me for quite some time, I could tell she was really thankful. When she pulled back, tears of happiness were in her eyes. "This means a lot to me."

I smiled at her. "It means a lot to me that you came to me this time," I caressed her cheek. "Thank you for that."

She pulled me back in for a hug.

Even though I enjoyed hugging her, I pulled back. I looked at her. "This time, we have to have a plan. We need to go over everything together. I want to be involved."

She nodded. "Of course," She smiled then. "Let's make a plan." She then pulled me with her to the couch.

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"I'd love to have a girl," T sighed happily. "Our own baby girl..."

I chuckled.

T looked down at her me, I was currently laying on her chest. "What do you want?" She asked, gaining my attention. "Boy or girl?"

"Uhm..." I thought it over for a bit. "I've always wanted a son," I looked up, at her face. "It's easier to dress them."

She chuckled.

"Either way," I said. "The gender shouldn't matter too much," I sat up to look at her properly. "As long as we have a child, right?"

She smiled at me, I could see the love in her eyes. With one glance, I could see how thankful and how happy she was that we were talking about this. I could see how much she wanted this. "Yes," She said. "A child."

I smiled and laid back down on her chest. We laid there, in silence. I think we were both thinking about a lot of things. "I wonder how it'll be," I eventually said. "Taking care of a child," I paused. "Being a parent..." I sighed.

T's grip on me tightened. "We'll do just fine," She simply stated. "We'll figure it out together." She then pecked my lips.

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I was seated outside Cam's house, by her front door. I had just texted her I was waiting for her by her front door. I expected her any moment now.

While I was waiting, I sighed and looked around the neighborhood. I wasn't really looking for anything. I was thinking. Thinking about what had happened today, and what was about to happen in the future. Was I really ready for that? Was it ok to commit to something I wasn't entirely sure of?

"Hey," Cam said as she opened her front door. "I didn't expect you here," She closed the front door and sat down next to me. She looked around before looking at me. "What's up?"

I gulped as I kept looking to nothing in particular. "T and I are planning to have a child," I looked down. "She'll get pregnant."

In the corner of my eyes, I could see Cam's facial expression change drastically. She clearly didn't expect me to deliver this news. 

After some time, I looked at her. I saw she was looking away. I wondered if she was thinking about it. And I wanted to know what she was thinking about. "What do you think?" I eventually asked.

She looked at me then. "What can I think of that?" She shook her head, looking away briefly. "I mean, I..." She sighed before looking at me. "It makes sense," She nodded slowly. "You two have prepared the rooms, the talks were happening..." She paused. "It makes sense."

I slowly nodded. It makes sense... Then why didn't it make sense to me?

Cam looked closely at me. "Right?"

I looked at her. "I don't know," I said and, right after, she sighed. "I don't know if I'm 100% committed."

"Oh, Leah..." She sighed deeply. "Then why agree with her?"

I gulped and looked away again. "I want to have a child with her," I nodded slowly. "I can't wait for us to have a child," I then looked at her. "But what if it ends badly again?"

Her facial expression changed again. She was clearly surprised to hear me say this.

"If it ends badly," I gulped and looked away. "I don't know what to do..." I gulped again. "I'm afraid, Cam."

She scooted closer to me and wrapped her arm around my shoulders. "It's ok to be scared for the unknown," She pulled me closer to her, into a warm embrace. "Just take it a day at a time," She patted my arm. "One tiny step at a time, ok?"

I slowly smiled. Maybe she was right... "Ok."