I'm Yours (Sequel to "You're mine")

Chapter 132: The outsider

Talia's POV

"So, this is your room?"

I looked up as I saw Leah enter my room. "Yeah," I said softly. I watched her look around. She was walking around and taking everything in of my relatively small room. "It is."

Leah nodded while continuing to observe my room. She stopped at my desk, where all my notes and sketches were. I wasn't good at drawing but enjoyed spending time with it here.

I gulped as I got worried when she stood there for quite some time. "That's my desk." I said the obvious.

She glanced at me briefly before looking at the papers on my desk. I guess they intrigued her.

I looked away, trying to calm myself down. Then I thought about the exercise I had learned here, to ease my breathing.

I got calm relatively fast. I was able to zone out a bit. But when I opened my eyes again, I gasped as Leah was standing in front of me.

"What are you doing?" She asked before sitting down with me on the ground.

I looked down, at my hands. I licked my lips. "I-it's an exercise."

Leah nodded. "What kind of exercise?"

I gulped. "To calm myself down."

"Sounds interesting," She said, slowly gaining my attention. "Can you tell me about it?"

I looked down again. "I have to focus on my breathing, living in the here and now."

She nodded again. "It looks like it's helping you."

"It is," I looked back at her. I nodded. "Yeah."

She slowly showed me a small smile. "That's good."

I smiled a bit before looking away. The little stitched heart came into view. She'll love the thought, I remember the therapist saying. Should I show it to her? Should I give it to her? Should I tell her about it?
But what if she doesn't like it? What if she thinks it's stupid? What if she doesn't care? What if she would just discard it when she gets out of here?

"T?"

I looked back at her. I saw, by the look on her face, that she had just said something and I didn't hear it. I must've zoned out.

She looked at me for a bit and then looked toward the stitched heart. "What's that?"

I gulped. "It's uhm..." I gulped again. "It's a heart." I took it in my hands and looked at it for a bit. Then I looked up at her and showed it to her.

She gently took it from me and observed it closely. I could see how she was inspecting it, the craftsmanship too. "It's nice," She concluded before giving it back to me. "Does it help you?"

She doesn't know I made it. She doesn't know it's for her. But should she know? "Yeah."

She nodded. "That's good."

I looked down, at the heart in my hands. I was gently squeezing it. I should say something. I should explain this to her. I felt horrible that she didn't react the way I wanted her to. But she didn't know...

"How are you doing?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

She didn't seem pleased with that answer as I heard a disapproving sigh.

I started squeezing the little heart harder as I felt like such a failure. All I could do these days, was upset her. I wasn't able to make her happy anymore. The one task I had, I failed at.
I started feeling really upset. Tears were forming in my eyes as the back of my throat started burning. I was going to cry...

"It's not been easy, alone with the boys."

I failed...

"They've been wondering when you get back home."

I'm such a failure...

"They want to tell you about school."

I should just disappear...

"They miss you a lot." 

I'm the worst...

"Your friends miss you too."

Nobody cares about me...

"I miss you too."

I looked up at her as I heard that sentence. She missed me? How? All I did, was hurt her and cause her to be unhappy. How could she miss me?
I blinked a few times as I was trying to process what she had just said.

Her eyes went back to the little heart in my hands. "Careful," She said, making me look at the little heart. I noticed just how hard I was squeezing it. "You don't want to break it, right?"

I looked back at her.

She smiled a bit before looking around, she seemed so uncomfortable here. I couldn't shake off the feeling that she wanted to leave.

"I think I want to get some rest." And if she's not making the decision, I'll make it for her.

"Oh," She nodded. "Ok," She got back up, but I stayed seated. She looked down at me. She licked her lips before looking away. "I'll see you in a week?"

I nodded and looked back down.

"Unless - "

"A week is fine."

"Ok," I heard her walk to the door. She seemed to wait for quite some time. "Bye."

I simply nodded and that's when she left.

As soon as she had disappeared, I started crying. I looked at the stitched heart in my hands, I was still squeezing it like crazy. It's so stupid! I squeezed and pulled and... I broke it.

_________________________

Leah's POV

I sighed as I made my way back down. I didn't get her. Before, we could understand each other so well. Why did it have to change? Why did we change?

"Hello," One of the nurses came to me. "You're Talia's wife, right?"

How did she know? "Yes," I nodded. "I just visited her."

She smiled. "That's good, she was looking forward to this visit."

She was? "I bet." Why didn't she show it? I always felt like she wanted me to leave...

"Did she give you her present?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Present?" I frowned. "No, she didn't."

The nurse frowned too. "That's odd," She thought about it. "She made it especially for you."

"She made something for me?" I was shocked.

She nodded. "A little stitched thingy," She thought some more. "I forgot what it was exactly."

Then I felt a pain in my chest, in my... heart. "A heart."

"That's it," She nodded. "She made that during the sewing activity."

Sewing activity? My wife seemed to be living a good life here, she seemed to be doing better, she seemed to enroll in different activities. And, for some reason, she kept me out of it. "Maybe next time." I said, trying to put on the best fake smile I could make at that moment.

"Yeah," She smiled at me. "Of course." And with that, she left.

I sighed deeply as I thought about that stitched heart. She had it in her hands, we talked about it... Why didn't she give it to me? Why didn't she talk some more about it? Why did she shut me out?

I walked away from the building, the center, back to the car. As I was almost gone, I took one final look. I looked at the building, roughly where I thought T's room was at. I didn't know whether she was looking at me, or whether she could even see me from there. But looking at that building from here, it was exactly how I felt right now: an outsider.