Collection of Destiel

Shattered Insanity

Dean was singing along to some song on the radio, he couldn't quite place the name but the chorus was familiar. There was a light drizzle softly panging against the windshield of the impala and the clouds were cast across the sky like scattered pieces of a long forgotten puzzle. His destination was one that he had traveled enough times that his hands moved the steering wheel on instinct. Seven years he had been going this way, seven years he had been visiting his best friend in the hospital.

Today was different. Underneath Dean's cool face there was an anxiety that was clawing into his insides until he felt like he was bleeding internally. An hour ago he had gotten a call. For seven years his best friend in the entire world had suffered a mental breakdown and gone insane. Dean didn't even know it could really happen outside of movies, for someone to actually literally lose their sanity. But for seven years he had visited his friend every day and there was no mistaking the insanity behind those eyes that used to be warm.

The call told him that he was requested at the hospital, nothing more and nothing less was said. With a heavy heart Dean turned the wheel into a sharp right turn and let himself rehash the past seven years. Castiel's family had wanted to induce a coma and let him die off peacefully. They said that there was nothing left saving in the man and that it would be cheaper to let him go. Dean had been enraged and called them all the worst names you could possibly imagine. That was how he had gotten full custody over Castiel and had begun paying for the medical stay. Never in all these past seven years was Dean ever able to imagine waking up one day with the knowledge that his best friend was no longer a car drive away.

He'd gotten a second job. Even lost most of his relationships because no one seemed to understand the bond between Dean and Castiel that kept them both alive. Dean couldn't let go of Castiel if someone paid him a trillion dollars. As the years had gone by so had Lisa, Aaron, Cassie, and all the others that he wished he could've loved half as much as he loved Castiel.

That was what broke Dean's heart. He loved Castiel and it wasn't until after his best friend had lost his mind that he realized it. All he could do was go and sit with him while he explained the path a bee follows. All he could do was hold Cas' limp hand and pray that one day that hand would squeeze his back.

One thing Dean Winchester understood was that he would never be able to give up on Castiel.

It was perfect timing when he pulled into a visitor's spot outside the hospital. The song ended just as he ripped his key from the ignition and stumbled out of his car. The walk toward the hospital reminded him of a criminal walking death row. If Castiel was finally gone... Dean didn't know what would come of himself. For seven years he had gripped to the hope that someday he'd be able have his friend back.

Thankfully the receptionist knew Dean well and nodded his head back toward the familiar hallway that would lead to Castiel's room. Dean wished that there was a comfort in the sounds of his footsteps but it was all hollow. His hands were cold and shaking at his sides. He couldn't let himself hope that this was a good call... because if it ended up being a bad one he would only be more destroyed.

He'd watched his father die in a hospital and he refused to watch Castiel die in one as well.

"Mr. Winchester?" Tessa's easy voice made some of the tension dissipate from his shoulders.

Dean looked up to see Castiel's doctor standing just outside his door. "What happened?" He couldn't keep his voice was wavering and tears started to pool over his eyes. All at once the only thing he could see was an image of Castiel lying unmoving on his bed.

Tessa gave him a bright smile. "You should see for yourself. You've been in here every day for the past seven years... I think that the best way for you to understand would be to go in and see him."