Collection of Destiel

Around To Be Loved

"A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved." – Kurt Vonnegut

~

There wasn't a purposeful motive behind the action nor was there really any thought into the outcome of the act. All Dean thought about as he was fitting a sheet to a spare bed in the spare bedroom of the bunker was that the air smelled slightly musty. So once the sheet was void of wrinkles and the pillow cases were all meticulously puffed Dean swiftly found himself hunting through one of the drawers in the bunker's kitchen for a plug-in wall air freshener.

The room smelled like 'Hawaiian Breeze' when Dean added a small shelf to the wall. He had peeled off his flannel as sweat collected on his brow from the exertion of hammering nails in a room without windows to carry a cool breeze. Standing back to admire the simple shelf, he realized all too sadly that it looked hauntingly empty.

As 'Hawaiian Breeze' was becoming almost nauseatingly potent, and many framed pictures of Team Free Will littered the small shelf above the bed, Dean noticed that there wasn't a coat hanger anywhere in the room. It seemed to him that it was an insult not to have such a thing in this room.

After a determined drive to a hardware store, a single hook hung from the inside of the door to this spare bedroom. Dean idly lost himself imagining the trench coat that would soon be hung from the metallic hook. It seemed childish... such a profound article of clothing just hanging there on a manmade hook.

Hours later, after the room was as homely as Dean thought it should be, he found himself seated at the kitchen table. He couldn't keep his leg from bouncing sporadically or his mind from racing in infinite loops. It was as if he was stuck in a nervous race with time. Time was all he had to count.

The sound of the door opening twitched at his ears but he didn't move, he didn't dare hold his breath. In his mind he wanted to seem cool and collected as his brother and angel came to seek him out. The smell of 'Hawaiian Breeze' was starting to fill the air in the kitchen.

"It was not humorous, Sam. The woman stated that I looked like I had been hit by an oncoming automobile. I harbor no scrapes or bruises." A deep calculation voice penetrated the tense air surrounding Dean with an almost aggressive calmness. "I believe she was simply being rude."

Chuckles sprinkled the air. "Dude, calm down. She was just sayin' you look kinda worn out. Which you do. You need rest."

The voices were getting closer, the louder the volume the harder Dean's finger nails dug into his palms and the damper his teeshirt felt against his heating skin.

"Rest." The word was muttered almost too quickly with a growing disdain. "I already find being human tiring."

"Let's just find Dean. I think he was making up the couch for you or something." Sam's voice was now just outside the kitchen's doorway. "Wait. Let me ask you something first."

"Is this a secret question?"

Dean's eyes widened at the now hushed tones. His head craned back as if pining for the words that he desperately wanted to cling to.

"Kinda." Sam let out a deep breath. "Back there, that one angel-"

"-Amiel-"

"-said that you could've stayed in heaven. What is that about?"

Dean felt his heart float up until it was caught in his throat.

This time it was Castiel who let out a deep sigh. "She was not mistaken. If I chose to I could have returned to my place in heaven."

"Then... why? Why would you choose to be human? You hate-"

"I have distaste for many things, Sam. But the thing that I love most in this world is worth being a human. He is worth dealing with the bowel movements, the glare of the sun, the aftertaste of food, and even the uncomfortable feeling in my back after that car ride. It was not a hard decision to make." The fallen angel's words seemed to echo throughout the entire bunker.

Before Dean could stop himself he was at his feet, causing the stool he was seated on to squeak abruptly. It seemed like that squeak rang in the awkward atmosphere until two sets of footsteps approached the kitchen door. The air was locked inside Dean's lungs when blue eyes sought out his.

Sam's mouth gaped a little when his eyes rose to see a 'Welcome Home' banner hanging lopsided from the kitchen's ceiling. And without further instruction, he ducked out to head to his room. One his way he breathed in an oddly calming scent with the raise of his eyebrow but didn't dare turn around to corner his brother about it.

Castiel didn't seem fazed. His expression was the same as it had been for many years as he donned wings. But there was something swimming in those blues that made Dean take just a small step forward. Time seemed to stop counting.

"Hello, Dean."

"Welcome home." A small upturn at Dean's lips seemed to calm the thundering ache in his chest. "I hope the drive wasn't too painful. Sam's taste in music-"

"It was pleasant. I wanted to thank you for allowing me stay here while I 'get on my feet'." The air quotes made both men break out into reminiscent smiles. "I wanted to ask if you would help teach me how to blend in as a human."

"'Course." Dean huffed out a little when he smelled 'Hawaiian Breeze' and his attention was pulled in another direction. "I made up a room for you."

"Sam seemed to think that a couch-"

"Dude, this is your home. You ain't sleeping on a couch." Dean started toward Cas' new room without worrying that the angel wasn't following behind. "I didn't really do much. Just made it up so that it'd be comfortable."

The moment the two of them were standing in the doorway Dean thought about what would happen the day that Castiel did leave, when he did figure out that he could have a life outside of this place. His heart broke at the thought of this room covered in dust, musty smelling, and void of any life from a fallen angel. As he became accustomed to doing, he swallowed the heartbreak and smiled.

"Dean.." Cas' eyes glazed over as they swept across the shelf with memories caught on paper of the happiest moments of his celestial life. "It's too much. I don't deserve-"

"You deserve the world, Cas." Dean bit his tongue but couldn't stop the flowing of words in a moment that he couldn't help but jump headfirst into. "You saved my ass, and more importantly Sammy's life, so many times I've lost count. This will always be a safe place for you to come home to. This room will always be yours if you want it. I just wish I could give you-"

His words were caught off when the air was knocked from his lungs by the collision of a full-sized angel against his chest. A nervous chuckle left his lips as he wound his arms around Castiel's shoulders and pulled the other man impossibly close.

"Thank you, Dean." Castiel pressed his words against Dean's neck. "For everything."

"You're welcome, angel."

"And Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"My home is and always will be with you."

Dean spent that night wrapped around the man of dreams staring at the shadows pronounced against the trenchcoat that was listlessly hanging from the door. A deep sense of home settled so deep in his bones he couldn't help but slip into sleep with a smile on his face and warm breath breezing against his cheek.