shawn mendes imagines [ COMPLETED ]

is it really me you're missing

i don't know how to feel anymore. he's fucked me over and lied to me so many times. i hate him for what he did to me. but somehow, a part of me still loves him.

when he tells me he misses me, my heart skips a beat. the familiar feeling of warmth and excitement returns.

but those feelings wash away when i remember what his true intentions are.

shawn never loved me as much as i loved him. don't get me wrong, i have no doubt that he loved me at some point. but i don't think he was ever in love. whereas i was.

after the second attempt of him trying to fix our relationship, i began to realise what he really wanted. and that was someone who would listen. someone who would care about what he had to say. someone who would help him through his issues. and i didn't mind.

i was happy to be a shoulder to cry on. i was happy to listen. i was happy to help him with his problems.

until one day.

one day i realised that i deserved better. i didn't deserve to be used like this. i deserved someone who really loved me. someone who would care for me and my feelings, but would still open up to me about their lives as well.

i've now realised that i was content with shawn using me for all those years because i was so hopelessly in love with him. and i'd be lying if i said that, deep down, there isn't a small part of me that still is.

but then i remind myself: it was never really me he was missing. i was just the only one who'd listen.

~~

this song is so fucking good oh my god. i linked it so i strongly recommend that you listen to it.