Limerence • Auli'i Cravalho (gxg)

always knows

From the moment you laid your eyes on her, your heart fell in love. But you couldn't tell her. You could never. She just seemed so out of your league, so beautiful, so perfect.
The girl was your roommate, also a girl well-liked by everyone, loved by everyone. Auli'i never liked the attention, preferring to slip under the radar and just exist. Over time, you and her got close becoming from acquaintances to close friends. Best friends, even. She gave you the most attention, and you knew that but tried denying it. So much so that your friends started making fun of you for it. They seriously thought you and Auli'i were dating, but chose to keep it quiet.

After a particularly shitty day at school, you returned to the apartment and immediately went to bed after turning on Do Not Disturb on your phone. When you woke up, you were no longer alone. Auli'i was home too, apparently waiting for you to wake up, she said. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." You replied dismissively.

"You're lying and you know it. You blew of your last class. I thought you were sick but you aren't. So something else must've happened."

"You don't have to be nice to me, you know?"

"What the heck are you saying? I'm not just being nice to you for the hell of it, y/n. I care about you. Is that so surprising?"

"Actually, yeah. Why?" You asked her back, getting out of bed and going to the restroom.

"Because I like you, y/n." She answered, frustrated. "You are not like everyone else who seem like they're just sucking up to me to get on my good side. They treat me like a celebrity-they worship me which is the last thing I want after spending so much of my time doing my job, acting."

"I can't, okay?" You told her, looking at her in the reflection with watery eyes.

"Can't what? Can't like me back? y/n, I'm not stupid."

You licked your lips, swallowing harshly as you exit the bathroom. "Yeah, so maybe I'm the one that's stupid, alright? I cannot like you. My parents will disown me if I do something like that."

"For having feelings?" She sniffled, also trying not to burst into tears. Her gaze momentarily softens.

"Auli'i, you don't get it. I came out to them and they thought it was some kind of joke. Then the next day they told me if I dared to bring a girl home, I wouldn't have a family anymore. I can't do that to you...I don't want them to hate you for nothing."

"y/n, I do not care if they hate me. I only care about you." She took your hand, "You're all that matters to me. You don't ever have to bring me home, I don't care about that. They don't have to know- I'll protect you. You have a home right here. With me. If they make you feel unsafe and terrified, that's not a home anymore, baby. That's just a house."

You avoided her gaze for dear life, not wanting her to see you crying. But she lifts your chin, pretty much making you look at her anyway. "It's about time for you to do what you want. You are your own person, don't let them control you. I understand it's scary, but you need to live your life for you. Not for them."

————

She took care of you when you were sick: making you soup, buying you medication, even going as far as cuddling with you because you asked her to in your state of grogginess. She was always ready to hang out with you, more often than not initiating the plans- brunches, lunches, movies, dinners, picnics, road trips. Anything and everything, as long as you wanted to do it, she was right there with you.
But the most telling thing? She canceled on a date to be with you after you got dumped by a friend. That friendship breakup was brutal. She could've just went ahead with her plans, but she didn't. In fact, you didn't even know she had plans that night until a whole two weeks later when it somehow came up. She stopped from doing an incredibly stupid thing, and she said those three words to you in the midst. You took it platonically, but obviously she meant otherwise while you were in denial.

She had been flirting with you since a whole year ago.

Your mind simply couldn't accept with all that you were dealing with family wise.

Maybe until right now.

"y/n, screw that asshole. He treated you like you were just there if he needed you. That's no friend!"

That night, you cried yourself to sleep while she held you. It was rough, but deep down you felt safe and loved with her.

She always knew what you needed. Auli'i always knows, and that scared you as much as you appreciated it. But...

Maybe it was time to finally accept it and give in to your heart. Live the life you were meant to live.

You hear her call your name and you snap out of your trance. "I'm so sorry." That was the first thing you said, "I'm sorry I ignored what you tried to tell me a year ago. I am so sorry for making you wait and wait and wait without letting you know what was really going on, Auli'i."

"You needed the time and I get that. You weren't ready to share it with me and that is fine, but please don't avoid me anymore. Let me be there for you. If you don't want us to date, so be it. I'm okay with that. I just don't want you to be scared, scared of me. I love you too much to lose you. No one's as supportive of me as you are. Sure, my Mom is but she lives far away. Everyone else...they just try and fail because it feels fake to me. It never feels genuine. But you, y/n, you are my biggest hype person through and through. You know my lines from start to finish, you know it all. But you also know me by my name. You know me as a human being, first and foremost. Not an actor."

"I—" A rather loud cry gets caught in your throat, making you wince. Auli'i engulfs you in a hug and your body takes this as a cue to let the tears flow. "I have a lot of issues of my own that I need to deal with, I know that and I am trying to get the help I need— I'm going to therapy now. But it's so hard because all my life I based my emotions on other people. I put them first. You've been the first and only person to make me feel safe enough to share what I feel, but sometimes I still struggle."

"I hear you, okay?" She broke away gently, "I'm here for you, to help you out in whatever way you need. But if you tell me to stay away, I will do just that and give you your space."

"Thanks." You say, wiping your tears away before looking back at her, "Auli'i, I uh- I really, really like you, too. More than just as a friend."

Her hand finds its way to yours, interlacing your fingers with her own before it settles on your waist, "Can I kiss you?"

You nodded in agreement, leaning in to allow her to give you a kiss as she cups your cheek with her free hand, wiping your tears away smoothly. The kiss then deepens instinctively, leaving your lips connected for a little longer before a mutual breakaway.

"Let's do something tonight to get your mind off of things, shall we? Go for a walk in the park and then sit down for a picnic?" Auli'i suggested hopefully.

"Okay." You let go of her hand to grab a tissue from the coffee table.

"Okay, then it's settled." She grins, "I'll go make us some food for later."

"Can I join you?" You asked quietly.

"Of course, babe. Come on."

————

Unedited. Published: Sunday, 28 April 2024

I am running out of ideas so please send any suggestions or requests you have, my way:') no smut atm though.