Avengers One Shots (Gay Ships)(Request Closed)

Thoughts (Steve x T'Challa)(SUICIDE IMPLICATION)

AN: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG @ I forget things easily especially when I have stuff to do.

Leave me more prompts tho guys, I'm just sorry if they take so long.

Summary: Ever since Civil War, Rogers had lost all confidence in himself and struggles through it in the worst way possible. Fortunately, the King of Wakanda is there to aid him.

Third Person's POV.

He looked at the knife on top of the table in his bedroom. He continued to stare at it with millions of thoughts running through his head. He let out a heavy sigh and picked up the small instrument before he moved into the bathroom.

For a long moment, he stared at himself in the mirror. His reflection stared back at him, a reflection he hardly recognised anymore. He looked so broken, all the life drained out of his light blue eyes. He set the knife down on the marble top and stared down into the sink.

'Where did it all go so wrong?' He asked himself, his mind too littered to find a proper answer. In all truth, the accords should never have happened. He never should have fought one of his closest friend for something as simple as a block of legal agreements. If he hadn't risked it all, he wouldn't be here, wallowing in self-depreciation. 'I lost Tony and now Bucky is gone as well.'

He couldn't help but slam his palms against the benchtop. If he were completely alone, he might have even screamed. His hand reached over for the knife once again and without much thought he ran a line across his arm.

It felt like nothing to him, as if the cut wasn't deep enough. Yet it was, blood gushed out of the wound and into the sink. His eyes followed the movement of the blood as it poured down his left arm.

He had placed his friends in prison and indefinitely stopped them from living a life of freedom. If he had to summarise it, he felt like one massive asshole. He hated himself. All this fighting, all this disagreement and all for what? For his family to be separated? For his childhood best friend to be in cryofreeze once again? All this, and it was all his damn fault.

This time he did shout, he screamed in pure frustration. His clear eyes were now covered in tears and he couldn't help but cry. His body shook as he tried to contain it to himself, as he tried to find the last shred of sanity he had.

He gripped against the bloodied knife and brought it in front of him. He studied it for a while, watched the blood drip off it and down his arm. He was one stroke away from relieving all his pain, all his misery. The darkness inside him consumed him to the point where there was no turning back after all he had already lost himself.

"What are you doing?" Somebody's voice suddenly boomed.

Steve Rogers jumped and dropped the knife into the sink. He had never gotten used to the feeling of somebody sneaking up on him.

"W-What are you doing in my room?" Rogers breathed as he studied the other man from head to toe. The King always had a presence, no matter the occasion.

"I just had a feeling Captain, I came to confirm my suspicions." T'Challa eyed the wound on Roger's arm. The blonde pulled his injured arm closer to him as if the other man hadn't already seen the wound. "Is something on your mind?"

"Nothing you can help with I think." Rogers scoffed and briefly looked at his reflection once again.

"Try me." The King smiled in a comforting manner and gestured that the soldier stepped out of the bathroom. Rogers did just that and T'challa motioned for the man's arm, the blonde hesitantly showed his wound. "It's not as deep as I thought it was." The King muttered under his breath and touched Roger's arm.

For a man with a powerful presence, he had a soft and reassuring touch.

"I've just been thinking." Steve started and winced when T'challa pressed against the outside of the wound.

"About?"

"About everything. About how much I screwed everything up."

"You did not do anything wrong Captain." T'challa responded, his eyes still focused on the wound. "I believe you are feeling guilt?"

"That's a mild way to put it yeah." Rogers smiled pathetically, he watched as the other man walked into the bathroom and returned with a first aid kit. "I lost my relationship with Tony, I lost a majority of my friends and I feel like I let down Bucky."

"You and Stark simply had contrasting ideologies. It is a shame you could not come to an agreement but ultimately it was not your fault." T'challa started as he opened the box and took out a foreign cream and bandages. "And you did not let down Sergeant Barnes, it was not that he did not trust you, he did not trust himself."

Rogers grimaced as the other man placed the cream on the wound, but to his surprise his wound started closing almost immediately. In the midst of his awe, he spoke, "Then tell me, was everything I did wrong?"

"I cannot make that decision for you Captain." T'Challa noted and wrapped the bandage around the man's arm. "Guilt is something many of us have the misfortune to carry. How you choose to move past it is solely up to oneself." The blonde listened intently, "You are a great man, many look up to you. I believe the beacon of justice shouldn't be so down on himself"

"I highly doubt I have that title now." Rogers couldn't help but smile. T'challa tied off the bandage and glanced up with a smile himself.

"Maybe." The King commented. "Ending your life Captain, although it may be the easiest way out, it may not be the best way out. I know it is difficult but you've survived until now."

"What if I need a lot of time?"

"There is nothing wrong with that. Take it at your own pace I would say." T'challa said and stared into the man's blue eyes. "You are strong Steve, I believe you'll get through this. If it comes to be difficult at times do not hesitate to ask for help."

Rogers couldn't help but smile genuinely this time. To hear words of encouragement after so long...it was just what he needed at this moment.