Dick dragged the blade across his wrist, tears streaming down his face. Why didn't he save Jason? Every cut was for another way he could've saved Jason. He could've found Joker earlier. He could've placed a tracker on Jason. He could've demanded to go with them. He could've killed the Joker years ago.
Another cut. How many way that? He'd lost track long ago. Black spots were dancing at the edge of his eyes, but he didn't care. Jason couldn't feel pain anymore. But he couldn't laugh anymore. He couldn't get aggravated, and give that look that made Dick want to slap him.
A broken sob left his throat. It tore through his body, making him drop the blade and curl up. Oh God, Jason was gone. He would never talk to his baby brother again. Bruce had to hate him. Why wouldn't he? He let Jason die.
Someone knocked on the bathroom door. "Dick? Are you ok?" Wally's voice cut through. Tears fell harder, Dick pulling at his hair. Bruce wasn't the only one who hated him, Wally did too. Why would Wally love a murderer like him?
The door opened, and Wally gasped. He kicked the offending blade away from Dick and pulled the boy close. Dick sobbed into Wally's neck, not bothering to hide his arm. Pongo whined and nosed at Dick's leg.
"Oh no. Dickie, tell me you didn't do this." Wally whispered. "I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry, Wally. I'm sorry." Dick babbled, harsher sobs tearing from his throat, hurting the skin. "Shh, it's ok Dickie. Just calm down, it's ok, I'm not mad. I need you to calm down ok? Pongo, fetch inhaler." Pongo ran out of the room and came back with the small blue inhaler. "Thanks, bud. Dickie? Can you hear me?"
"It's my fault, my fault. My fault he's gone." Dick whimpered. "No, babe. This isn't your fault. What happened to him wasn't on you." Wally said, pressing a wash cloth to Dick's arm. "I could've saved him. I could've saved everyone from that stupid clown years ago if I'd just man up and kill him." Dick sobbed.
"Don't say that! You couldn't have changed anything, angel. But don't say you'd have killed Joker. That's what he wants." "But he killed Jason! He killed my baby brother. I could've killed him years ago and saved Jason."
"What happen, none of us can change. But don't do this. Don't hurt yourself, please. We need to get you help. I need to call Leslie." Wally kissed Dick's forehead. "Will she tell anyone?" "No. I can tell her to keep it a secret, and we'll say it happened in a torture session, ok? But please don't do this again. I love you too much to lose." Dick nodded. "I'm sorry." "Don't apologize, Dick. It's not your fault."
