summary: patton is a scam artist, he decides to write a song about some of the men he's deceived. memories come flooding back as the song goes on.
word count: 1089
this was purely bc i love this song and the idea that patton is faking his personality is godly (also i cut my hair yesterday and it is making me so e u p h o r i c)
tw// unsympathetic patton (kinda), theft (if that's an issue), that's all i believe :))
~~~~
Patton smiled to himself as he finally finished writing his new song. He'd based it on the experiences he had in his 20s. He strummed on his guitar and began singing quietly.
"Well, I had me a boy, turned him into a man. I showed him all the things that he didn't understand, woah. And then I let him go." His name was Roman. They'd met when Patton was 21 and Roman had just turned 19. Patton adored how truly stupid Roman was, he never once noticed that Patton was a scam artist that had slowly been taking money from his bank account. After two months, Patton left Roman stranded in some motel room. He stole his car, $650 (along with the money he'd been wiring from Roman's account), and his heart. Since he'd made up a fake identity around Roman, and ditched the car, Romans couldn't trace Patton anywhere. Even after almost ten years, he couldn't be linked back to him.
"Now there's one in California who's been cursing my name, 'cause I found me a better lover in the UK. Hey, until I made my getaway." That was a fun winter, Patton recalled. Virgil and Logan, Patton had to admit he wasn't really with them for the money. It was more self-indulgent, just messing around and having fun as a 25 year old. Virgil was an art student he bumped into at a Los Angeles coffee shop, he seemed tough on the outside but soft on the inside. Patton always made sure he knew who he was scamming so he could appeal to them more.
With Roman, and many other men, he acted very childish but Virgil seemed to take to a more parental persona. Patton assumed this was because his dad left when he was younger, and his mom never showed him affection. Their relationship lasted about a month before Virgil got sick of the parental personality. It didn't matter much since Patton had begun texting a man named Logan, a man he decided was his next target. So Patton packed up and left, taking only about $350 dollars. Virgil immediately noticed his missing money and spammed Patton's phone for weeks before Patton decided to trash it and get a new number.
As soon as he arrived in the UK, he met up with Logan in a bookshop, quickly realizing Logan loved talking about himself and feeling superior to others. Patton decided to play dumb with him, it was a lot easier to trick Logan if he didn't think he was mentally capable of it. After a month, though, Patton could sense something was wrong. Logan was much more observant than anyone else, so he was catching on. But he was also rich, even once the European money was transferred into American money, so Patton went out with a bang. He took a final $500 and ended up with a grand total of $800 from Logan. He packed up again and headed back to America.
"One, two, three, they gonna run back to me. 'Cause I'm the best baby that they never gotta keep. One, two, three, they gonna run back to me. They always wanna come, but they never wanna leave. Ex's and the oh, oh, oh's they haunt me, like ghosts. They want me to make 'em all, they won't let go, ex's and oh's." Patton paused and smiled at the memories before continuing.
"I had a summer lover down in New Orleans, kept him warm in the winter, left him frozen in the spring. My, my, how the seasons go by." Janus, the only man Patton had ever genuinely loved. They met last year in May at a party, both 29 years old. Patton had been invited by his old high school friend, why Thomas invited him after over a decade of not talking was a wonder but he went anyways. Patton was leaning against the wall since he didn't really know anyone there until Janus came up to him. He told Patton he seemed lonely and he wanted to keep him company, so Patton stayed. As soon as they started talking, Patton could tell he liked Janus. He didn't want to scam him, he didn't want to take his money or watch the expression on his face when he realizes Patton didn't care. He wanted to see him smile, he wanted to laugh with him and show him just how much he did care.
"I get high, and I love to get low. So the hearts keep breaking, and the heads just roll, you know, that's how the story goes." Soon January had ended and Patton felt himself falling in deeper for Janus. On February 3rd, Janus's birthday, Patton left $50 as a birthday gift and a letter for Janus. All he took was a few Polaroid pictures they had taken together and one of Janus's sweaters. Patton knew Janus was awake, he knew he had seen him, but Janus didn't stop him. Patton explained everything in the letter, he told him the truth. Patton hadn't heard from him since, he hadn't heard from the police either so he assumed Janus decided not to rat him out for the scamming and theft.
"One, two, three, they gonna run back to me. 'Cause I'm the best baby that they never gotta keep. One, two, three, they gonna run back to me. They always wanna come, but they never wanna leave. Ex's and the oh, oh, oh's they haunt me, like ghosts. They want me to make 'em all, they won't let go. My ex's and the oh, oh, oh's they haunt me, like ghosts. They want me to make 'em all, they won't let go, ex's and oh's." Patton idly strummed his guitar for a small interlude, he envisioned an electric guitar for this part.
"One, two, three, they gonna run back to me; climbing over mountains and a-sailing over seas. One, two, three, they gonna run back to me, they always wanna come, but they never wanna leave. My ex's and the oh, oh, oh's they haunt me, like ghosts. They want me to make 'em all, they won't let go. Ex's and the oh, oh, oh's they haunt me, like ghosts. They want me to make 'em all, they won't let go, ex's and oh's." Patton ended the song and laid his guitar gently on his bed. He tugged Janus's yellow sweater tighter around himself and sighed, the smile that graced his face just moments ago was replaced with a frown.
~~~~
i purposely made patton be all happy and unsympathetic for his victims in the beginning then get sad once it got to janus bc he woves him uwu anywho, hope you enjoyed, love y'all, stay safe, buh bye!!
10/17/20
YOU ARE READING
Sanders Sides One-Shots
Fanfiction~ every ship except remrom, thomas x sides, and no x reader :) (a lot of poly ships aren't in here but that's just bc there's so many variations that it'd be hard to get all of them djfhksk) ~ NO smut here, just angst and fluff :)) ~ posting on satu...
