lauren // tig trager

79. Ex-junkie, med school dropout

Preface : before reading this chapter, I want to apologize for no trigger warning on my last chapter. I also want to let each and everyone of my lovely readers to know I'm here. I'm here to talk anytime. I personally am struggling with my own shit, probably why I made Brea do those things, as she is based off of me. So I guess it reflects how I was feeling at the time and now even. I love you all and here's an early update since I'll be busy tomorrow night. Much love xoxo brea

*****

Everything felt like it was in slow motion. Jax and Tara couldn't run up the steps fast enough. Jax pulling Chibs from Brea to console him and give Tara space. Tara trying to find out what went down. She went to the bathroom, finding the bottle of pills and vodka, she sighed. Pulling a trash can and sticking her fingers down Brea's throat to get her to vomit. Chibs cried watching her do so. His heart being torn to shreds, it was no easier for Jax. Seeing one of his brothers and a friend of his hurt like this.

"I should've come home earlier" Chibs cried, filling with guilt.

"She'll be alright, it's okay, brother. You don't get to blame yourself, not for this" Jax held him, stroking his hair out from his crying face.

*****

They all stayed for their own reasons. Chibs for obvious reasons, Jax wanting to be there knowing he could've done something and Tara for medical assistance. Gemma was at the house with the boys for them. Chibs laid beside her in bed, Jax sat on the floor and Tara leaned against a wall.

Brea eventually came to it and cried seeing everyone. She placed a hand over her face and Chibs jumped. Tara and Jax were startled at the sound, but relieved to see her awake and alive.

"Love?" He asked, wanting to hear her voice.

"Oh, god," she whispered hoarse from the intrusion of Taras fingers earlier "I'm so sorry"

"You're alive and that's all that matters" Jax spoke as he stood up.

"Please, go" Brea spoke, barely audible.

"Bre-"

"Go! Get out!" She screamed, tears streaming from her face as she threw her arm down on the bed.

Chibs took them out the room, leaving Brea alone. She held her face in her hands, crying out of embarrassment. Jax and Tara seeing her so low, and failing in general.

"Make sure she's drinking lot of water. I'd say to lock up pills but she could always go buy more. She needs help, Chibs" Tara sympathized with him.

"I brought it up, she didn't want it" Jax spoke, slicking his hair back.

"Jesus Christ, I dunno," Chibs sighed, his voice cracking "why would she do this?" He cried.

"Give her space for now, then talk to her when it feels right. We'll be here, brother" Jax pat his shoulder.

"Aye, now you guys get home with your boys. Thank you both"

"Anytime" Tara smiled softly.

"Goodnight"

Chibs walked back in his room and she was laying on her side. He approached her cautiously and carefully. Sliding into bed, spooning her, grabbing her hand.

"I love you" he mumbled against the back of her neck.

The words gave her chills and tears filled her eyes. She stifled back a sob.

"I'm sorry, Filip"

"Sleep, darlin'" he cooed.

He felt her body relax and breathing change. He knew she was asleep but he couldn't bring himself to do the same. He couldn't let anything happen to her under his watch again.

*****

Chibs heard his cell ring in the morning, Brea still sound asleep. He walked out the room to answer the call. It was Gemma, Tara got a death threat and they needed Chibs help. They needed to get her and the boys to TM for lockdown. He agreed, of course, but had to awaken Brea as well. Dragging her along with him to Tara's where they rounded up the kids. It was as if last night never even happened, Brea wasn't complaining.

Chibs held a crying Abel, trying to comfort him. He cried for his daddy, who was nowhere around at the moment. It made Brea's heart warm to see Chibs soothing Abel as if he was his own child.

"Get your medical bag" Gemma said to Tara right before they all left.

"Shit" Tara mumbled.

Brea took Thomas while Tara grabbed her things. gemma helped Chibs and Brea load Abel and Thomas into Gemma's car.

"You two gonna have kids, huh?" Gemma asked them.

"Tha's a talk for later," Chibs chuckled "we've gotta get married first, get her a crow"

"Well hurry it up why don't ya?" She urged them, creating a laugh from them both.

*****

At the clubhouse, Alvarez was dragged in by his men. Tara had him hoisted onto the chapel table as she got her equipment out.

"I need someone else in here to help me" she called out.

Chibs turned to Lauren, he didn't want to leave Brea alone. He knew she was surrounded by the club, but it just felt right to stay by her side.

"Go learn somethin, aye?" He suggested half heartedly, trying not to sound like a dick.

Lauren looked at Chibs and then Brea. She could tell something was off. Tara had even been keeping up with what was happening. There was a secret and she knew who she'd go to to figure it out as soon as she could.

"Lauren" Tara called out her name, taking Chibs side.

"We're letting an ex-junkie, med school drop out help. What the hell even happened?" She threw her arms up as she walked to the chapel.

"It's nothing much, you'll probably just hold a gauze on his shoulder if I need you too" Tara shrugged.

"What happened?" Lauren whispered now that it was just them.

"What do you mean? The only one bleeding here is him, that's what we're worried about right now" Tara bullshitted.

"Filip, you didn't have to do that. Now it looks obvious" she sighed, lighting a cigarette.

"I'm jus helpin' out my ol' ladies best friend, aye? Nothin' weird about tha" he replied, taking the cigarette from her mouth.

"Anyone tell Gemma?"

"Nah, I doubt it. Only us, Tara and Jax know. She didn't say anythin this mornin " he whispered back.

"Why'd you call Jax over with Tara?"

"I needed somebody too, and he cares about ya, lass" he shrugged and Brea snatched her cigarette back.

The boys were focused in on Alvarez lying on the table, not the conversation happening right next to them. Tig's eyes were trained on Lauren but he could hear the whole conversation beside him. Him and Lauren were as confused as each other.