lauren // tig trager

89. Big changes

Late at night Chibs was awoken from his sleep with a phone call. Same call rang Tigs phone a minute earlier. Both of them being told that Clay was in the hospital. Chibs filled Brea in, Tig filling in Lauren and each left their homes to go to St. Thomas.

Chibs sat on the waiting room table, Tig standing impatiently and Happy in a chair. Roosevelt questioned Unser about the shooting. He already knew his story was bullshit. Blaming the shooting on black. Chibs bounced his feet with anxiety. Once Roosevelt left, Tig walked towards Unser. This prompted Chibs and Happy to also join.

"So they were black? Niners?" Tig asked, plotting revenge in his head.

"Had to be" Chibs stated.

"I'm not sure, didn't see colors" Unser clarified and left when he saw Gemma.

That left Tig, Chibs and Happy in the waiting room.

"Clay wanted me to stay, said he had a feeling something was going down" Tig spoke.

"We don' know anythin' yet, Tiggy, okay?" Chibs tried to calm him, sensing his mind was racing.

"I do, I do, I do," Tig rambled "a brother asked for help, I turned my back" he said out loud but it was to himself.

Tig didn't make eye contact before he left. Chibs protested but he didn't listen. He had a one track mind and that was avenging Clays injury.

Tara had gone home earlier that day, after the whole pregnant thing. Brea stuck around to help her pack before going home with Chibs and Tara to her house. Lauren had left her dads and made desserts to get her mind off of things. She tried to ignore what her father told her, it carried bad vibes but it was still there. It weighed heavy on her no matter what she tried. Like if she would even have kids now, she had a feeling something bad would happen to them. Had a bad feeling ever since she left like that event was gonna happen soon.

When Tig left in the middle of the night, to see Clay who was shot, maybe that was it. It didn't hit her but it hit Tig. Everything that happened seemed to have to hit Tig before it got to her. Only once it passed Tig and hit her but ever since, Tig was her guardian angel. He took hit after hit for her it seemed. That hurt the more she thought about it.

Brea laid awake, head filling with a list of things she had to do now. What could go wrong, what she had to buy and appointments she had to make. She knew she wouldn't want to announce the pregnancy until after the first trimester, that's when most miscarriages took place. She had to get a doctor to confirm it then and then decorate the nursery. The list filled up quite fast and she couldn't handle it.

Chibs had stayed overnight, coffee was no help. He decided he needed to go home, be with his old lady. He was on his way out when Jax was making his way in.

"Hey, what's up? You aren't stayin?" Jax stopped Chibs with a hand on his chest.

"Brea's home alone, pregnant. I need to be with her, aye?" Chibs replied.

"I ain't stopping you, man. Congrats by the way, tell Brea I said so" Jax said in a hug he shared with Chibs.

"Thanks, I will. Hap and the boys can fill ya in. If ya need anythin', call me, I'll be aroun'"

"Alright. Now go home, dad" Jax chuckled.

*****

Lauren had heard nothing all day from Tig and it was around lunch. She stopped by the hospital and he wasn't there, not in the waiting room at least. So she waited there. None of the boys were there, no one was. She saw his bike so she knew he was there somewhere.

Chibs was called back in after coming home to Brea for a few hours. Gave him time to nap and catch up on sleep. Gemma had come by, waving to Lauren but then proceeding to find Tig. He fell apart in her arms, blaming himself for it all. When he left the room, Lauren could see the hurt in his eyes. She stood to meet him in the hallway, holding his face. She wiped away the tears and kissed him softly.

"Baby," she whispered "what'd you do?" She shook her head.

"It was for Clay, that's what matters"

"No," she hit his chest "what matters is if your shit is gonna blow back on me, on us"

"What the hell is wrong with you? Talking to Tara recently? Moral compass bein' readjusted? Don't worry about what I do. That's not your business"

"Don't treat me like that, Tig"

"Like what?" He asked angrily.

"An old lady, b-"

"That's exactly what you are and all you ever will be. An old lady from the day we dated to the day I proposed. All you will be is an old lady so get it right" Tig snapped on her.

Lauren bit the inside of her cheek and stepped back. Tig left, not thinking twice about what he had said in blind rage. All he saw was red. Lauren felt that insult deep inside, it hurt her even if she wanted to think it didn't. It was all falling apart it seemed and she couldn't keep up with any of it.

Gemma left the room and saw Lauren standing in the hallway. She was silent. Gemma wrapped an arm around her.

"He's stressed, baby" she whispered.

"Give him a right to talk to me like shit?" Lauren said back to her.

"No, but that hate isn't directed towards you is what I'm saying. That anger is from inside, hatred for himself spilling out. It's been a few years you two been together, no matter how much you think you know him, you don't know it all. How broken that boy is, how hurt" Gemma shook her head, knowing him.

"Yeah, I get it. But I love him, no matter how damaged or hurt"

"Of course you do. That's your old man" Gemma smiled at her.

*****

Tig spent his day in the room with Clay. Sitting by his side in silence, watching cable tv. Clay went in and out of conciseness. Lauren left him. She'd walk by and peer in the window every now and then and he was always in the same spot. It got boring and she left, went to TM.

It was another messy day, everyone all over at different times all day. Never knowing when you'd see somewhere or where they'd be. Jax, Gemma and  Tig were frequently at the hospital. Brea spent a lot of time home, alone. The boys out doing different things for the club. No time to stop or slow down for anything.

Breas phone rang, from Chibs. She answered.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Love, I want ya down at the clubhouse. Think there are gonna be some changes and I want ya there" he told her "might be in church when you get there but jus' wait for me"

"Alright, I'll be there" she nodded.

*****

When Brea arrived, he was in church, the doors closed. Tara and Gemma were there as well, only one missing was Lauren. Tara walked in, and Brea poked her head in seconds later. Chibs saw her and turned to Jax, asking for permission almost and Jax approved. Chibs turned back to her and motioned for her to come in with his head. She felt eyes on her as she walked to his side, kissing him.

"Sargent at arms?" She whispered to him, tracing his new flash.

"Big changes, I told ya. For you, me and the new one" he smiled, pressing his forehead to hers as she sat on his lap.

"And I'm here, every step of the way" she whispered against his lips.

Tig watched as Jax and Tara had their moment, Chibs and Brea having theirs. It made him realize his true standing with Lauren and how he messed up because his blind judgment. It was one of his many faults.

He lost his patch, his president and his girl.