Avengers - Heal

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(Trigger warning, eating disorder, abuse and trauma. It's based of a nightmare of course)

You had been with the Avengers for two weeks now. They had rescued you after you almost destroyed he city when your power went haywire.
It had been a busy two weeks for the Avengers. Tonight was the first night you were all having dinner together.
You were nervous, not only about talking to all of the team, but you also had another secret that you didn't want to come out.
You made it downstairs seeing everyone beginning to gather around the table.

"Y/N! You want a drink?" Tony asked as you smiled a little.

"N-No thanks, I'll just have some water." You replied as he nodded and poured you a glass of water.
Soon everyone was seated around the table, there was a whole array of food laid out. Some home cooked but most was take out, you didn't mind.
Bucky handed you a plate and you watched everyone take some food. You saw a plain bread roll and put it on your plate as you watched everyone eat and talk.

"Dig in Y/N, there's plenty here!" Tony shouted as you smiled and took small bites from your bread roll.

"I-It's okay, I'm not very hungry." You muttered, Bucky looked at you with worry as the team went on with chatting.

"You haven't eaten much lately doll, don't you want some food?" He asked as you looked up at him.

"No, it's okay. Really." You whispered finishing off the bread roll and looking around the room.
Soon everyone finished off and Bucky noticed you hadn't touched any of the food.

"Do you want me to wash up?" You asked Tony as you helped him clear the table.

"Nah it's okay, I have the best dishwasher in the world." He said making you laugh a little.
Everyone decided to watch a movie together, you sat on the couch and watched. Soon everyone went to bed and you stayed up, you snuck into the pantry and found a small candy. Your hands were shaking as you took it from one of the shelves.
You sat behind the counter and slowly unwrapped the candy before popping it into your mouth.

"Hey, is that one of my candies?" You heard a voice say as you looked up to see Natasha. You panicked and quickly stood up.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I-I was hungry, and I didn't want anyone to notice any food gone. I'm sorry, I-I'll buy you a new one." You muttered backing away from her.

"Y/N it's okay. I really don't mind." She said as you shook your head.

"No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have eaten without permission, I'm sorry." You whispered before running past her and into the elevator.
Bucky came into the room in time to see you running off.

"What happened?" Bucky asked worriedly.

"She ate one of my candies and when I saw her she panicked and kept apologising. She said she was hungry but didn't want anyone to notice food missing. Maybe I should go see if she's okay." Nat explained to Bucky before he stopped her.

"It's okay, I have an idea what's going on. I'll go talk to her." Bucky said as Nat nodded and let Bucky chase after you.

You were on the roof curled in a ball against the wall as you whispered to yourself.
You heard a noise and looked up to see Bucky. You shook with fear as he looked down at you sadly.

"I-I'm sorry, I'll replace it I promise." You whispered as he knelt down to you.

"Y/N, it's okay. It was just a piece of candy. Natasha isn't angry at all. Do you want to tell me what's going on?" He asked as you tried your best to not cry. He sat beside you.

"I don't know much about your past, where you came from or much else. Do you want to talk about it?" Bucky asked as you looked out into the clear sky.

"I'm...older than you realise. I was born in 1789." You muttered as Bucky looked at you in shock.

"Wow, that's pretty old. But I'm listening, tell me whatever you want to."

"Alright."

You were about eight years old, you lived with just your father and older brother. But your brother was barely around.
Your father always locked you alone in your room, made sure you only ever ate with his permission.
You hadn't eaten in three days, you were so hungry. You managed to get your door unlocked and snuck downstairs of your father's giant mansion.
You went into the pantry and found some of your brothers candy. You smiled and ate a few of them before shoving them into your pocket.
You heard a noise and looked behind you to see your father holding a candle, he looked so angry.

"What in gods name do you think you're doing?" He growled as you looked up at him in fear.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was so hungry, I just wanted to have some candy." You whispered out as he placed the light down and grabbed you by the arm dragging you back upstairs.

"Please! I was just hungry!" You shouted as he threw you into your room making you fall to the ground.

"I never gave you permission to eat did I!?" He shouted at you making you tear up.

"No." You whispered as he looked down at you in anger.

"And yet you ate! And you ate candy! Do you want to become fat? Do you want to become unappealing so no man will ever take you?" He growled as you shook your head and sniffled.

"Then you'll listen to me and never eat without my permission!" He screamed in your face as you cried.

"I'm sorry!" You shouted back before he slapped you across the face.

"And now I need to punish you for disobeying." He growled as you cried more.

Bucky looked at you in shock as you finished your story.

"He had his ways of making sure I would never disobey him again. One day he made a deal with a scientist who had created some sort of serum. The serum was supposed to make sure I'd never need to eat again, but instead it made me immortal and have powers. It hurt so much, I lost control and killed my father and brother. After that I just lived life on the run, I still needed to eat because the serum didn't work. Every three days I would eat a bread roll. Sometimes I would steal a piece of candy, but after I did it I would sob my eyes out." You whispered as Bucky still looked at you.

"How long were you locked in that room with your father controlling what you ate?" Bucky asked making you chuckle dryly.

"Seventeen years." You replied as he looked at you sadly.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. We had no idea. I promise you can always talk to me about this stuff, what you went through wasn't fair. You were just a kid." He said making tears stream down your face.

"You're safe here, we're all going to help you okay?" Bucky said as you nodded and leapt into his arms hugging him tightly.

"We'll take all of this slow, you don't need to be afraid anymore."

(Sorry this was a little short! But I just wanted to write about the nightmare and give it a happy ending)

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