ᒪIᗷᖇᗩᖇY ᖇᗴᐯIᗴᗯՏ 2.0

🔖Game Of Realms: Angels, Gods And Mortals

Author: CallmeBethel

Reviewer: _xPandorax_

🔹Cover: 10/10

I love the cover!!!!! It's beatiful and gives off a mystery vibe for sure! I like how you include kinda the 3 parts of the realm at the bottom which instantly helps the reader figure out just what the book is going to entail or what big powers its going to be focused around. The colours honestly suit your title perfectly and the font is nice and big. Maybe a bit basic? The only thing I would change is the font. Maybe choose one that better suits the story by looking at the plot and the setting where everything is taking place.

🔹Title: 10/10

I love the title. If this was on a book shelf I'd 100% pick it up. The idea of angel, gods and mortals, (three powers all at different levels) and the idea that all of them will be in some sort of game (that's what I'd think) already catches my attention. I love it when the impossible is put into the story. One would think that how can a God be beaten by a mortal which realistically is not possible but in a story, anything is!

🔹Blurb: 7/10

The blurb kind of set me off balance in a way. The number of characters introduced is perfect and actually follows a similar outline to a book I am reading right now called The House of Dragons where in the blurb the author outlines everyone who's really taking place in the battle/game. However here, I can't seem to make out just who is a god, mortal and angel. It would help to be a bit more specific when introducing a character. For example: Daniel Chase, an angel of the heavens, knew the world was not just science. Now I don't know if Daniel is an angel lol but just as an example. But as you can see, I specified exactly what realm he falls under and that will make it easier for your readers to have somewhat of a background understanding before going into the story.

🔹Creativity: 7/10

The creativity is 100% there. The numerous mythological concepts embedded into this story are strong and powerful and anyone who enjoys the list that you have under your blurb, this is defintiely the story for them. However, the reason I removed some points off is because I noticed there to be a lack of detail in terms of how these people all look. Even the setting around them. Most of the story is dialogue and despite dialogue being important, SO IS DETAIL! Add detail about the character's appearences, the setting, is it during the day or night and hows it like. What creatures lurk around? The better you get your audience to imagine the story, the better it'll be successful 100%

🔹Plot: 14/15

I think that the plot begins moving at a very fast pace. For example, in the second chapter with Lucifer, when he meets Lilith, let them get acquianted before quickly jumping in and being allies. By the way they acted, it looks like they've known each other for years!

🔹Characters: 8/10

I like how you narrow down the number of characters in the story which is really good. It helps the reader stay focused on them with a few secondary characters coming into the mix every now and then. You also bring them all from different backgrounds and realms which increases the specific character's significance. One reason I took points off is the lack of character development which is hard to see in the first couple chapters. But I do think they all grow as time goes on considering each chapter is in the point of view of a specific persona. One thing you can do that will bring the story much more together is bringing in the other characters in that chapter even if its lets say focusing/in the POV of Lucifer. It helps to keep them all somehow connected which you do in some chapters, but sometimes not in others. This is a suggestion so don't think you have to do it!

🔹Grammar: 7/15

So basic grammar like capitalization and periods are there which is great. There are a lot of run-on sentences which should be edited and it would help to put a comma in the appropriate place. Commas are used for pauses but to also divide dependant and independent clauses which is something I advise looking into! Because trust me, when you do that it causes a huge change to your writing and the way you writing style goes. Another thing I want to point out is including commas in quotation. An example is, "Hey there," she said with a smile. A comma should be placed before the second quotation mark when its followed up by a description of the person saying it as shown in the example. Overall, good job!

🔹Communication With Readers: 5/5

Great communication with readers. Readers love it when authors reply to their comments. Makes them feel appreciated and knowing you see them, means a lot!

🔹Overall impression: 13/15

Overall I love the amount of research done before this novel began. It is clear you have a passion for mythologies and its amazing to see you making a novel out of it! For people who share that passion, this is for sure a #1 pick. So everyone reading this review, if you like mythological plots based on greek, egyption and all sorts of realms out there, GIVE THIS STORY A SHOT!!!

Total: 81/100